Help!?!? Are these parents abusive?!
Question: Help!?!? Are these parents abusive?
"My dad isn't even talking to me xD.he just yelled at me cause the doors open. this is getting old..fast. I didn't do anything. He wont even let me take a shower... Im about to kill my self. Im not eve kidding. I never do anything right and if i start crying my mom will just tell me to grow up..
I didn't do anything...i just want nice parents, who i can talk to like yours..you can talk to your about life and your past and ask them for stuff. and now their yelling at me cause i didn't clean the living room even though none of its mine , i had to clean my room, the bathroom THEIR bathroom and now my mom just threw a shoe at me because i didn't clean the living room..
help me.."
Thats one of them
"my fish jumped out of its tank into the sink, and i screamed and said momma, for her to help me. and she yelled at me and told me to grow up and that I'm starting to worry her, and my dad said im so immature...
I am mature. They wont let me grow up, every time i say something to them no matter what it is they yell at me and tell me to shut up and that im irresponable and stupid..how the hell and i supposed to grow up when everything i say they throw me down, and insult me?..
I don't know what to do XD...Am I immature? I don't think i am, they DONT LET me grow up, they keep insulting me over and over and over every time i open my mouth, saying im ungrateful, stupid, immature, irresponiable...I don't know what to do. I want to get away from them. Their horrible people. I hate them. Theyr're not my parents. They shouldn't be on this earth, why did God make them my parents...."
"Im about to just..die. Im already stressed XD about everythign.. i can't talk to them about ANYTHING, even if its school work...they say im stupid and don't know what I'm talking about. No matter what, If i complain about my feet hurting they call me lazy, if i ask for help with my homework, they say im irresponsiable and need help with everything, if i ask to do my own laundry, they take is as im complaining that they do it wrong. and if i complain about chas to them ,they say im immature and ahve to ''deal with people i don't like" and that im " just as bad as her, if not worse"...I dont know. im a horrible person...i am XD why els would they treat me like this ? i honestly don't know what to do..."
Answers:
UGH! That's totally abusive! The name-calling and constant put downs is verbal and mental abuse, and throwing things is physical abuse. I saw in one of the texts you copied from her to your post here that she said you can talk to your parents about anything whereas she cannot - do your parents know she's being treated this horribly? If not, since you seem to have such a great relationship with them, and obviously care about this girl, maybe you should let them in on it and get some advice? They may know what to do. That's not a safe or healthy environment for her to stay in.
If you or your parents don't feel comfortable getting involved, then she needs to have the courage to report this on her own. She can go to her School Counselor/Teacher/Principal, a doctor, or Minister/Priest for help.
She's lucky to have a boyfriend like you in her life, James, who cares this much. If she does follow through with getting help, or if your family makes the move to get her help, she's going to need you to be strong while the next moves are made. You asking if she's being abused and how you can help shows you care and love her, so you need to continue to show that love as much as you can during the next steps. Good luck to both of you.
Ahh, the sounds of abusive parents. Call CPS or 911 and report this. Don't let her suffer, let her know she isn't alone and how much love she deserves.
She may be acting immaturely by not cleaning when her parents, do but these forms of verbal discipline are abusive.
Had extremely abusive and neglective parents
Yeah they do sound abusive. Do something about this right now.
They sound like it to me...they need help!
No body is perfect...especially kids!
They sound like horrible people. God, it must be hell to live with such monsters. And if all is true, then this is def a form of mental and emotional abuse and neglect. I feel for her and she'll most likely be scarred for a long time b/c of their abuse.
Yea thats sounding real close to verbal and mental abuse...i worked in a psych unit where parents really messed there kids up...if she is in high school she can be emancipated but its a tough process and its also just as hard to be out there on your own, if she can withstand it for the next couple years i say blow the parents off, and not mind what they say...try to be strong and she needs to have good friends support or foundation...and you seem like a really good concerned friend so it you just talk to her get her through be strong with her she can make it....thats what i had to do
seriously get your GF out of there these people sound the monsters if this goes on this may cause long term damage toward her get her out while she's still mentaly stable, the last message kinda scared me it seems she's cracking if she starts to believe the things they say there may be no coming back, the part where she said "i'm a horrible person" that made me draw a tear if possible GET HER AWAY FROM THEM and remind her who she really is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your friend writes..."...they keep insulting me over and over and over every time I open my mouth saying I'm ungrateful, stupid, immature, irresponsible.." And so, yes, name calling is verbal and emotional abuse.
And so I have to ask, is your friend a Drama Queen who constantly seeks attention or creates drama for attention? Then this can get old really fast in a family! And so, should your friend learn to be more self sufficient and self reliant and a self-starter where her responsibilities are concerned?
I don't know...but I'll bet you do!
I am so sorry :(
I would talk to your parents and let the school counselor know immediately about how your gf is talking (about wanting to die). I never take these things lightly as you just never know. Sounds to me like a very dysfunctional, abusive home. I grew up in a physically and emotionally abusive home and it is just awful. The effects have lasted my entire life -and I am 40 (gasp).
She needs help and is crying out to you for you to do something...you cannot handle this alone...please do not think that you can as it is just too complicated...and it is too much for you to be expected to bear alone.
YES! YES THEY ARE! Please please please help her and tell someone about it like an adult you trust. I really feel for her, ive been through most of my parents stupid **** and i don't want her to go through all of that.