im too depressed to keep avoiding cutting?!

The minute you pick up the instrument to cut with, Stop and think why? Why am I harming myself when I haven't done anything to be guilty of. Stop it. Just stop and think about it all. Its silly. You are not relieving pressure by bloodletting your body. Its an illusion. It feeds into the illusion of the pressure you feel under.

Go for a walk , go to a movie, do something good for yourself for a change. Believe in yourself and let the pressure move on to another person . You don't need it in your life. You can do it, others have and you can too.

You need to admit yourself into a mental health hospital. You'll get all the help you'll need there.

Keep a diary.
Exercise.
Indulge in artwork.
Begin a project.
Broaden your musical boundaries.

I wouldn't say that I was depressed, but I sure as hell am not normal.

When you feel like screaming or cutting go for a run, it can help get rid of built up anger/aggression/tension.

Keep a diary, and write what has happened in the day, do it every 4 hours.
Write what has happened and how you feel on a scale of 1 - 10.
Then show this to your councilor trust me, this REALLY helps make progress with them, it can also help detect what makes you feel happier and what makes you hit rock bottom.

When you want to talk about how you feel, but can't express yourself, try art work. I know it sounds daft, but say for example, if you'd just been bullied by someone at school, draw them, big and angry and you in front of them, small and weak, or if for example, your family is falling apart and your losing everything, why not draw something like each member how they are in your family, for example, if your dad is a drunk, draw him drunk, or at a pub, if your mother is angry or sad all the time, draw her angry or sad, (I don't know how old you are or what situation your in, but try to draw what's going on and you'll soon get carried away with it, even if it's just stick men, it will help, also, show this to your councilor too, it helps show them how you feel, even when you can't talk about it)

Begin a project, something to take your mind off what's happening around you, maybe a scrapbook, or photography or even a good book will do, a film maybe, something you can escape into.

Music, this can help alter how you feel, if you listen to death metal for example, it will make you feel angry and bleak. which is good for when you need to vent, but not for when you need to relax or feel Happy. Here's a Guide of what I find, helps my moods/how I feel:

Classical Music - I know it sounds stupid, but it helps me unwind, when there are so many thoughts in my head, I stick something soothing on, like Aphex Twin - Avril 14th. I let my self fall into the music, this works well on a night, when you want to sleep, but find yourself to restless.

Metal - I find this helps when I'm angry and am in need of a vent, I put it as loud as it will go, then go for a run with it blaring away in my ears.

Power metal - such as Sonata Arctica, help me go into my own little world. Same goes for artists like Florence and the machine, Kate Bush, ect.

Drum and bass - I listen to this when I feel like I'm falling into a pit of despair and need to raise my heart beat.

Dupstep - I use this as a relaxation technique. And just fall into the beat.

Is this making any Sense?

Also, sometimes, it's just all too much and you can't prevent yourself from hitting rock bottom you just have to sit back and let it roll over you like an 18-Wheeler, Wait till after wards to pick up the pieces.

Also, I don't know if this is any use, but I just found this online. http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Yourself-Fee…

Hope this helps.