SOMEBODY HELP! A misunderstanding blown out of proportion.?!
Question: SOMEBODY HELP! A misunderstanding blown out of proportion.?
My brother and her sister were dating before we met. I was known as a not serious person that always played around so my brother didnt want me dating this girl as shes a virgin. and didnt want problems with her sister. They were always having problems.
Me and this girl couldnt keep away from eachother.
The last weeks have been good. We had a little problem she slapped me a couple of times we solved it it was my fault.
She lost her virginity to me in the 3rd month.
My dad was having problems that she was a christian and we fought and i was basically sleeping in my garage or 2 weeks. So one day i saw her and my little sister messaging on facebook while i was in the garage, and sent a msg to my sister telling her please if she asks im home.
When i said that i got paranoid my little sister would think im cheating. So i wrote to her, ps im not cheating, i really like this girl:)...
a couple of days later she came over to my house and wanted to show me a msg on facebook. She opened this message and saw it and flipped out and started screaming, her right. I wanted to solve the problem immediately and my sister was sick in the other room sleeping so jumped to put my hand over her mouth so she wouldnt scream and we would solve the problem immediately. When I did that somehow i broke her nose. Note. she fainted and fell down the stairs and broke her nose a couple months ago.
She told me my nose is broken i didnt believe her. well it is.:S i feel absolutely shocked horrible and disgusted.
Ive been apologizing so much and telling her i love her always and im there for her, she broke up with me and said im capable of this now what are you capable of later, im getting away from you now.
The first day she told me go away dont talk to me dont msg me. So i went to my friends to get away. the 2nd day i talked to her sister her sister said no hard feeling i dont think your an evil beast but if you guys have reached this far than maybe you shouldnt be together, i told her shes the best thing that ever happend to me and i wouldnt ever mean to hurt her and im sorry to both of them. She said dont msg or call shell talk eventually. so that night i went to my friends again to stay away. Night came she msged where are you, i was absolutely surprised and happy to see a msg. so i immediately left my friends told her im home sorry was in the living room chatting to my mom. Was paranoid shed get upset if she knew i was at my friends. So it turns out she was under my friends throwing the perfume bottle i got her for valentines. She keeps on msging me cursing me, telling me how much she hates me. and she can never be with me again. I really love this girl shes my life i wake up and sleep to her, how can i get her back. Whatever she curses me I say im here or you always and forever whatever you need. She says bye then msgs back. I turned off my phone for 4 hour went for a walk when i came back she had asked my sister where i was? and checked my garage i my car was there. This morning also she went around my house and checked. What does this mean? what can i do? i cant see her much because her parents are strict christians and hate muslims. Anyone have any ideas?
note: when she came over she came to show me something. Basically her sisster wanted my brother her ex to delete all her photos, she sent him a nice clear msg saying pls take off the pics, no hard feelings. He replied it my fb its my life not your business, dont hate me cuz im a muslim, now all the girl can say is i dont want muslim around me, she doesnt mean it she just says meaningless words when shes mad.
what can i do? do i give her time? do i wait under her house untill she come out and jump on her car and try to speak to her? help
Answers:
You need counselling. You have a problem with pathological lying. Relationships ARE NOT going to work for you, unless you get this problem resolved. After you get counselling, you may find that your former choices for a romantic partner were not healthy for you, and would never have been able to lead to a happy, successful relationship.
It is possible that you have a mental health disorder, such as BPD or depression that is exacerbating this situation. You are showing some signs of denial or delusion, where your stated beliefs about what she is thinking and feeling are in direct contradiction to what she is actually saying to you about what she is thinking and feeling. If you are going to have a relationship based on trust and respect, then you have to start by taking the other person at their word. If they are not being truthful with you, then you need to ask yourself how you will ever have an honest relationship, when there is no honest communication.
So -- first things first -- get counselling.
Sorry things are going badly for you. Unfortunately, they will continue to go badly until you begin to understand what is causing the drama -- lying, denial, violence, not taking people at their word.
Caution: Depending on where you live, If you continue behaving in this fashion, you could end up in prison or on a sex offender registry list.
Best Wishes and Good Luck!!
PS: in your update, you mentioned you were "going crazy". You need to consider that that may actually be true. The romantic relationship seems to have triggered an underlying mental health issue. The kind of drama you are describing is not what people experience in a healthy relationship. This relationship is dysfunctional and hurtful. You need to get some distance, and get some help, and get yourself together.