Why do i take things personal, i'm paranoid over little things, i over thin!

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters

> every time i listen to the beatles i always think of school and what people say and i hate SO MUCH it makes me pretty down and out -
"it makes me" - it's your brain. Brains require a lot of management. A brain is a huge thinking machine- it's just a machine generating thoughts. Keep working with yours and inform it to "please stop thinking of that" and "please stop hating that". The brain thinks of things and often it generates feelings to match, and then we feel the feelings and think the thoughts are real. Does that make sense? The feelings give us the experience that the thoughts are accurate. The thoughts are not accurate, as you know.

Like thinking about a murder or Columbine- on the one hand, it's no big deal, they're just thoughts. There's no danger. But then the brain imagines something and we feel fear! Suddenly, due to the fear, the thought seems more real. The fear was a real feeling, generated by the thought. But there's still no danger. What you can do when this happens is notice it. Tell your brain that the idea of danger is just a superstition. You're as safe as you've always been and can it please not generate fear?

The fear you feel is real. The danger is not. It's natural for the brain to worry about weird stuff, but it's not a good use of your brain's time and it's not helpful. Reassure your brain that all is well, that it's just worrying. Reassure it that IT CREATED the fear, there's no danger outside.

This nutty kid at school can be useful to you. Pay attention carefully when he says something and your brain reacts. Notice what thoughts arise. Maybe this kid looks a bit like one of the Columbine kids or maybe when you learned of Columbine, you saw this kid. Or maybe it's entirely different. It may take a while, but try to discover the mechanism by which your brain creates a problem out of this kid's actions.

When you're feeling "down and out"- what's happening there? Something unhappy happened to me when I was young. Later, when someone would yell at me, I'd be upset for a while- a few hours or longer. What I discovered was that my brain would start thinking about that other situation and relive THAT upset. Brains are really very simple machines. The complexity comes from all the different kinds of thoughts and feelings in our memories. The actual workings of the brain are pretty simple. The cool thing is, you can speak to your brain and influence it and actually reprogram it, though it takes time.

Take responsibility for your brain, in the sense that you stop attributing your experiences to circumstances and other people. It's great to work to manipulate your environment, too, but at the same time, notice how your brain generates your experience.

Another way to train your brain is through meditation. Start with 10 minutes twice a day. Get a book, or find a class somewhere. It's just about concentrating on one sensation, like the feeling of your breath as it leaves your nostrils. Just concentrate on that for 10 minutes. In the beginning, you won't be able to. Your mind will wander and generate thoughts. Just notice the thoughts and bring your attention back to the sensation. You can do this at school, too, when the fear arises. Just focus the mind on a sensation and notice the thoughts...

Also, exercise for 45-60 minutes a day- some kind of aerobic activity like biking or running or jumping rope or swimming. Exercise releases stress so you can be calmer all day. And it releases calming chemicals which both reduce stress and helps the body grow. And it will help you sleep better, making the rest of the day, and the next day, less stressful. Plus, it fills the body with sensations. Notice all the feelings of weight and movement, notice the sensations. This will reinforce what you learn during meditation.

> i love my life,im grateful ...

Wonderful- many people your age don't have this. One thing you can do to reinforce this is to tell people about it. Like go talk to your mom. Tell her you're having a problem in school and that it's weird because you love life so much outside of school. Thank her for being such a great mom and for filling your life with love.

To summarize:
Work with your brain by talking to it about the thoughts and feelings it generates.
Don't blame the circumstances, take responsibility for working with your brain
exercise daily and notice the sensations
meditate daily on a sensation
talk to your mom, or other close friends and family about good stuff in your life & thankfulness
arrange for hugs and connection

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin