i cant relax around women unless i am d runk?!

I can understand. I think you may be putting too much value into the interactions you have. The stakes are too high. You probably feel that in a normal situation, if you 'fail,' it is pretty serious. My advice, is lower the stakes. Find girls to screw up with. Go into it telling yourself that you are going to crash and burn (not to psych yourself out, but because you don't care about the outcome). Be yourself, don't worry about anything she says. Don't try to pick her up, don't have any expectations other than you expect that the next 15 minutes are the only time in your life you will ever talk to her. Often guys feel like they are on an interview that they can't come off looking bad, or it screws up the rest of their lives. You are going to interact with thousands of people in your life. Many of those are just going to be for a few mintues only, and you will never see them again. So create a few situations where you know that going into it. Go up to a girl, have a quick conversation, and leave (and don't try to make it any more than that). If you do that you will build up experience not trying to make situations more critical than they really are. It may be awkward, you may feel foolish, or they may treat you poorly, but the result will be after a while that non drunk interaction will seem less critical because you will have disconnected it from a sense of expectation that it has to go somewhere, or that you are jeapordizing anything if you 'screw up.'

Anyway, the realest people in life, overlook people who screw up but try, fake people will issues are often critical of everyone else because they are afraid of anyone ever uncovering their own flaws (the whole a best defence is a good offence thing).

Well if it helps, girls don't usually like drunks. Start reading some books on how to talk with women or how to date. It would be much better for you than tossing your life down a bottle.