The girl that used to love me doesn't want to be with me because of her par!
Question: The girl that used to love me doesn't want to be with me because of her parents. Should I keep talking to her?
I used to love this girl .She used to love me too . She was madly in love with me. She wanted to be with me and noone else. She wanted me to marry her. But since her parents talked to her and told her "how bad of a person" I am , She told me she can't be with me because of that.
I still love her and was very hurt because she said she couldn't be with me anymore.
To give you a little bit of background I come a very abusive family. My parents have verbally and emotionally abused me over the years and my brother physically, emotionally and verbally.
They lied lied and did some more lying to make me believe I was a "bad person" Until i made the decision to leave the state without telling them and decided to make a life of my own. In the mean time I had to depend on them a few times money wise, which I now regret... The reason why I regret that is because my mother told the mom of the girl I love that they spend half of my brothers salary on me.. I don't know what other things they might have told her mom , who inturn yelled at the girl , which changed her mind..
I don't know how to make her understand that they are really poisonous. She used to understand me "very well" . But now she tells me things like you should call your mom, what did she do wrong and things like that which hurt me a lot, because in the past she did understand what i went through and was very much in love with me..
anyway, writing this is making me sad..She still calls now and then, But I dn't know if I should continue this.. because I am getting more and more close to her and think of this as if one day she'll like me or something, like a little kid..
I have been through a lot and every time I talk to her I get this feeling that she's gonna leave me again , a feeling of abandonment . A feeling that i went through when I was a child. Is that dynamics that's keeping me attached to her. I don't know. But I guess I have boundary issues. Do you think I should still keep talking to her since now I know she changed.. and she told me she changed...
I still love her and was very hurt because she said she couldn't be with me anymore.
To give you a little bit of background I come a very abusive family. My parents have verbally and emotionally abused me over the years and my brother physically, emotionally and verbally.
They lied lied and did some more lying to make me believe I was a "bad person" Until i made the decision to leave the state without telling them and decided to make a life of my own. In the mean time I had to depend on them a few times money wise, which I now regret... The reason why I regret that is because my mother told the mom of the girl I love that they spend half of my brothers salary on me.. I don't know what other things they might have told her mom , who inturn yelled at the girl , which changed her mind..
I don't know how to make her understand that they are really poisonous. She used to understand me "very well" . But now she tells me things like you should call your mom, what did she do wrong and things like that which hurt me a lot, because in the past she did understand what i went through and was very much in love with me..
anyway, writing this is making me sad..She still calls now and then, But I dn't know if I should continue this.. because I am getting more and more close to her and think of this as if one day she'll like me or something, like a little kid..
I have been through a lot and every time I talk to her I get this feeling that she's gonna leave me again , a feeling of abandonment . A feeling that i went through when I was a child. Is that dynamics that's keeping me attached to her. I don't know. But I guess I have boundary issues. Do you think I should still keep talking to her since now I know she changed.. and she told me she changed...
Answers:
I'd say stop talking to her, because it's not healthy for you, and she made her choice(history tells you, under pressure, she chooses other people over you), so it's time to move on.
First of all FORGET everything that anybody else thinks. Then meet up with her, just you two. Ask her what she really wants, and let her know you love her, if she doesn't love you she will just forget you. End of I guess...