Question:
Would marrying my fiance be a mistake like my mom says? Advice?
I am 25 and have been dating my partner for a year but have known him for 3yrs, He is 32 & treats me like a princess, to him nothing is good enough for me. We got engaged two weeks ago and he wants us to elope which is an idea i love as my family are not supportive of our relationship & he comes from a violent broken home. My mom has begged me to take the marriage slow as she says i'll one day regret marrying him & that there are better men out there, which hurt my feelings. I know what my fiance is like, he has a hair triggered temper, and will sometimes quickly resort to violence in a threatening situation, but he has never showed that side of him to me nor have i ever felt afraid of him, He has gone out of his way with my mom & shows her a friendly, softer side to him but nothing ever works for her. He can be so romantic and we spend hours in bed together & he never wants me to leave, Surprises me with stuff all the time, He is also very affectionate with me and holds me close to him and constantly tells me he loves me, even in bed if i move away from him he pulls me back into his arms, i love him. I want her to support my decision as he means everything to me. Any advice?
Answers:
she may be afraid his violent side will eventually be turned on you
i don't have a good answer for you. marry him, maybe he will win her over in time. or marry him, maybe he will turn on you and your mother will be right
turns out either way it is your decision to make. good luck, i hope you are right
He is quick to resort to violence in a threatening situation? He sounds unstable or at the very least irrational. Have you taken this into consideration? I'm not sure why you are accepting of this. Imagine a scenario where his hotheadedness lands him in prison on assault charges. You are then married to a felon, a stain that does not wash away. His employment prospects will be severely limited. What if he is unable to control his temper and he commits murder? At the very least think this through very carefully. Ask him to attend anger management classes. He needs to learn self-control.