Do you think I am one of the most depressed people?!
Question: Do you think I am one of the most depressed people?
I been diagnosed with those in my 16 years. I also probably have possible sadistic, and antisocial disorders. I also would not be surprised if I had more disorders too. I am very emotional and have very sensitive feelings. I get hurt very easily and cry for 1-2 hours if not longer. I was bullied verbally and physically.
I also been hurt my a lot of girls, friends, and family. I often get blamed on for things I did not even do in my younger youth. When I turned 14 I sort of lost my remorse and empathy and turned sort of sadistic and psychopathic. I also noticed I dwell on the past and it haunts me. I cry myself to sleep a lot of the time.
I even make myself cry to torture myself sometimes. It's sort of like automatic. I guess you can it post-traumatic stress. I also have a lot of insomnia. I been told I will probably end up being a future serial killer / rapist. I been I look emotionally disturbed, stressed, and tired. All I ever wanted was to have a wife and kids. I wanted to make my parents proud. It was all I wanted.
I been told I sit around feeling sorry for myself and I need to get out and do things. The thing is on top of all my problems. I already accepted I'm dead and already accepted I'm to far gone. I always say it's a slow end. I am so lacking of interests and I have no motivation or energy to do things. My mom says I turned from a polite kid to a cruel, mean, racist, and ruthless person.
I guess I sort of turned into a narcissist. I can not even make friends anymore. I do not even want too. I actually grew accustomed to being anti-social and isolating myself. I am moral less. I lost all will power. I guess I am kind of egocentric, so it's hard for people to understand me.
I also have claustrophobia, decidophobia, dysmorphophobia, ergophobia, gelotophobia, glossophobia, homophobia, kinemortophobia, nyctophobia, panphobia, phasmophobia, sociophobia, scolionophobia, scopophobia, taphophobia, and xenophobia.
I also noticed a bit of voyeurism. I have lots of problems and issues. I am always judged. I am always called weired and people tell other people to stay away from me. It is very depressing and difficult to have a life and leads to suicidal and self-harm thoughts. I even tried committing suicide. I even did self-harm.
You may need to Google, or use Wikipedia for the definition if you do not know what they mean. I used a dictionary. Thank you for reading and taking time out of your day.
Answers:
Well i don't think your wanting attention, i think you want to get if off your chest. I think that i would be pretty depressed too, but not forever. You said it's too far gone, your world can't get any better but it can i swear it can. I have had social anxiety since 6th grade & it was bad to say the least. I ended up having a panic attack & i get the symptoms of one when i have anxiety at all now. It sucks. But i don't want to live like this forever-im not a loser. So i figured out that if i dont think about all my problems, if i just do things & get out of the house i feel better for the rest of the day if not longer. I feel like i can do this no matter what life throws at me i can get better. I wont go into how bad they anxiety, depression, and panic was but i know i thought that i would never get better & i asked how in the world i even could.
I have never been so close to suicide before in my life...i really was out of it. I even scared myself because i honestly thought i was going crazy. But now i know...feelings i have are just that. Their feelings & they can't harm you & you have more control over your thoughts & reactions than you think. You might feel helpless, that your mind just does this on it's own but your wrong. It's you who does this, it's your thinking that makes it that way.
This might sound really stupid, but seriously you need to stop being so sad. It doesn't seem that wasy but it is. Think positive...cause wtf does negative get you? It gets you...more negative. You didnt do anything, and you are a human being you deserve to live life like everyone else has the chance to.
I think you need to take your mind off your problems-mental and whatever other problems you have. Try and make things better because it seems like it's blocking you from what you want but it's not. Just go out...for a really long walk & look at all your missing out on. Then walk home & decide that your not going to miss out anymore. Do something about it. Go out with friends, do home improvement, find something you love to do. Diversion is a big part of what you should try.
I know i dont have the same problems as you, but i've been through some hard times just the same. & how to get out of them is being strong and knowing that some way you can.
Cause anything is possible i dont care who you are or what situation you have-cause i have gotten through mental problems on my own because i try to get better. If you dont try, you wont.
I also think that...you are a hypocondract because nobody has that many problems. You might believe you have that many...but i highly dought you do. Thats like me saying omg a panic attack-it must be caused by hyper tension & a thyroid problem. Like no...
You should stop thinking about your problems, and find things you love doing. If when your mind is off the things that are bothering you...thats a huge step
im not a physcologist & im not sure if the things i've said are right for you but i know you can feel better. If i can you can. & trust me things can get much worse...
Good luck & yah srry this was sooooooo long but it makes me sad ur sad
Making serious mental issues into a contest kinda makes you look like a douche. But if you really are all these things, get help? I would think it would be a greater priority to treat these ailments rather than rank them...
My opinion? well, I think you're just starved for attention, that's all.
Really? body dymorphic disorder?....on top of all that other crap?...did you not mention that you're adopted too?.....cuz it sounds like it to me....or you were abandoned.....or in some home or something.....but somehow you are smart enough to spell really well, write really well, semi-express yourself well,....you pretty much sound like you have your game under control.....yeah I'd say you might turn out like you say you're going to....but then you also said you're 16 which just makes me think you're a teenager who has a parent who can somehow afford to take her kid to a really special doctor or,...a teenager who's already been in enough trouble to where he's been in the system enough that he's forced to go through the system enough to where he's gotten enough tags on him that he's forced to believe that crap......so which one is it?...obviously you have no Dad now right?....so what gives?....either you have the brains to stop this crap or you have just enough brains to buy into the crap that you've been told...either way, you're smart enough to understand what I just wrote.
Nathan......
P.S....I've been you boywonder,....I bought that T-shirt but I didn't wear it very long. I'm 52 now. snap out of it..you got a life to live.
No Here is the thing. When you are having a massive amount of trouble it is time to relax and drink a cold glass of water. 15 years ago I was trying to figure out what is my problem and said I have all these anger problems.I thought I could just zero in on what my problem was. I just tried everyday to say to myself today is a new beginning. After that for a while you start beliving it. ALso go on to YOU-TUBE and find some songs that makes you feel good. TRy to laugh everyday and take a walk everyday as well.
Personal experience
None of us could tell you -- you'd have to get the statistics for every depressed person in the world, and (somehow) determine accurately how they would be ranked. Which is retarded and can't happen. Just grow up and stop paying attention to ranks and labels. Who cares who the "most depressed" is? What would that mean exactly, and why would it matter? All you did was list your issues as if they were medals of honor.
The only person that is going to be able to help you is yourself. You are very tense and need to relax a little. Try not to think about the things that get to you the most. People are not perfect, not you, not me. You need to try to see that a bully or someone judging you as the same way. They make bad decisions, and it's not your fault. There is always someone that will be there for you when you are unable to handle a certain situation, you just have to express your feelings to them.
It's difficult for me personally to read about your personal issues, because I know that there is very little i can do to help it. You just have to listen to what I'm saying. Your life is worth more to you than it is to the people who bother you. You need to do a search and find out who you really are. YOu need to do that without thinking about harming yourself.
I don't even know you and I do care about you.
it sounds like you have an extremely tough life. but the main thing is to stay positive and not keep reminding yourself you're all these things. telling yourself you're this and that, is setting it into your brain that you are those things. you may feel like you are in a position where there's no point to life, but there is. if you take things slowly, step by step, you may find that you can turn your life around.
first, i'd recommend you see you local family doctor and talk to them about exactly how you feel. then talk about how you'd like your life to be. your doctor may give you some ways to help with this.
your family also love you no matter what, no matter how miserable you seem, so maybe start interacting with them more, try being more postive towards them, let them know you want to change and they will support you. you could start with helping your mum around the house.
as you start to help out and let others help and support you, you'll start to feel better and more confident about yourself. if you are willing to change you can turn your life around slowly but steadily.
also know that if others tease you, that's totally their problem not yours and that they have no right to do that. totally ignore anything that they say.
Good luck and all the best! :)