can you possibly help me?!


Question: Can you possibly help me?
I am 15 years old, im almost at the end of my sophomore year.I am usually a really good straight A student but since 7th grade its been getting worse and worse. I just don't feel like trying anymore im done with all of this.
I have a really bad family, no one gets along with each other everyone fights all the time. I wish my family could be called a family but in all honesty its not. We've been having a lot of money problems for the past 5 years and are constantly worrying about losing our home again, which we in fact just did.
I cry constantly and randomly at night, but have been holding most of it in because its just too much for me to handle the emotions right now.
I do my best to be accepted by my mother but she just hates me. I know people say mothers always love their children but not in this case. I also think i am adopted by my mother, i look a lot like my half sisters mother and my half sister (my dads kid). Im definitely my dads kid but my mom has no proof that i am hers. Ive asked her for my birth certificate but she doesn't have it i her what time i was born she doesn't know (but she knows my other 2 sisters and my brothers and has their birth certificates). Ive tried to obtain mine from the town hall but they tell me i cant have it they wont let my grandmother get it for me or anything. oh and no pictures of her with me when i was a baby only when i was 2 and up everything else is me and my dad and my "half sister".
Just thinking i may be partially adopted by someone who hates me is a lot of stress.
Im in the middle of moving, we have no money things are tight.
In the past i resorted to cutting to relieve the stress. It worked so good so i did it all the time and was okay, better than i was. A friend found me doing it, that was the end of that and i decided to end my life.
I went home knowing no one would be in the house for a few hours that day. I sat on the couch with a bottle of pills and started taking one after another and just kept on going i had taken maybe 15 or 20 and my older sister had came home. she made me puke (forcibly) and saved my life. that was about a year ago.
today i sat down with a bottle and thought about doing it Again when i got an i love you text from my boyfriend who is at school states away from me and i put it back and just layed there.

I dont know what to do. I cant help the thoughts im thinking but anytime i say something to my parents to hint at anything they thing im kidding laugh it off and walk away. I need help but i need to know whats wrong, im afraid to ask for help i dont know what i can do without involving my parents.
any advice?

Answers:

When 18, reapply for a copy of your birth certificate, as you will need it, as an adult. It's alright to OCCASIONALLY tell a close friend that you are feeling down at the moment, and ask if it happens to them, and what do they do about it. Professional advice is to go out with friends regularly, even if you don't feel like it much. In "Feeling Good - the new mood therapy" by David D. Burns, M.D., from your bookstore, or Amazon.com, he recommends that you estimate beforehand how pleasureable it will be, out of 10. Then, some few hours after returning, rate the actual event. Keep a journal for this, and the other things he advises, and examine your progress. There is a relationship between melatonin, which is produced by the brain during sleep, and the neurotransmitter, serotonin, which has been shown to be low in people suffering from depression. Although pre-teens need around the same sleep time as adults, teens may need up to 9.5 hrs. Many teens are naturally predisposed to, or prefer to stay up late, and get up late, but societal, and school demands are such as to often preclude this. Some schools are changing their timetables to accomodate this, but they are, so far, few, and far between. Get bright light on awakening, preferably for 2 hrs, but at least 30 mns, to reset your circadian rhythm. It's also a good idea to get bright light again in the evening, so you cover a daily span of 14 hrs; say 7 - 7.30 AM and 7.30 - 9 PM, then reduce light levels to simulate approaching darkness, in preparation for sleep. Depression impairs cognitive functioning, and can cause insomnia, which is addressed on pages 1, and O, at http://your-mental-health.8m.com/blank_25.html Teen resources; see page 2; suicidal thoughts; page D. Emotional thought stopping; page Y. Take the depression quiz at http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au and print the result. Take to a doctor, for tests. I advise against the use of antidepressants for those less than around 24 -25, due to their increased risk of suicide, homicide, or aberrant behaviour. If antidepressants are offered, say "thank you very much, doctor", and pocket the prescription, but don't fill it until giving the alternative treatments a good tryout. Antidepressants will still be available, if required, (unlikely) but it's best to avoid the risks, and side effects, if at all possible. I only recommend their use as a treatment of first choice in exceptional circumstances. Check out: http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2010/05/08/robert-whitaker-interview.aspx and related articles and http://suiciderateup.wordpress.com

See pages 3, and b, at 8m.com, for effective, non medication based depression treatments. Try them for 3 - 6 months, to see if they are sufficient. If not (which is unlikely) the core treatments should still be maintained, as neither antidepressants, nor St. John's Wort, nor supplements should be relied on as the sole treatment for depression. Always check out medications first at www.drugs.com & www.rxlist.com & http://mediguard.org and read any inserts, or labels. Be on the alert for any of the abovementioned effects. I suggest that you use the many teen resources on page 2, at 8m.com. Most people these days are deficient in vitamins, minerals, and/or Omega 3 fatty acids, so a sensible approach is to test for, and address any which are found, because they may well be the cause, or exacerbating the depression. Note that St. John's Wort usually takes 2 - 6 weeks to start reaching maximum effectiveness, and there are things you need to know about it, so don't just pick up the first one you see in a supermarket and expect instant results. Check out the information provided, particularly the SJW & HYPERICUM websites, and choose an EFFECTIVE brand! Perika, Jarsin, or Kira are recommended. See http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Can_you_take_St_Johns_Wort_and_5-HTP_at_the_same_time Google: "St. John's Wort; 5-htp" Teens tend to want things: "right here; right now" and 5-htp acts quicker, but use a maximum daily dosage of 50 mg. Read: When Nothing Matters Anymore: A Survival Guide for Depressed Teens by Bev Cobain R.N. C., & Beyond the Blues: A Workbook to Help Teens Overcome Depression by Lisa M. Schab, & Understanding Teenage Depression: A Guide to Diagnosis, Treatment, and Management by Dr. Maureen Empfield and Nicholas Bakalar, & A Relentless Hope: Surviving the Storm of Teen Depression by Gary E. Nelson, "Mom, I Hate My Life!": Becoming Your Daughter's Ally Through the Emotional Ups and Downs of Adolescence (A Hand-in-Hand Book) by Sharon A. Hersh, from your bookstore, or more media is at Amazon.com searchbar: teenage depression. View http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_teen_teenagers.htm & http://curetogether.com/depression/ig/treatment-effectiveness-vs-popularity

Girls could benefit by maintaining a daily journal, and mood chart, (rating out of 10) and seeing if they can correlate it with their menstrual cycle. If so, take the quiz on page R, at 8m.com about PMS/PMDD. http://www.womentowomen.com/assessments/hormonalhealth/ Use http://www.patientslikeme.com/mood/community?gclid=CMvT06b9_J4CFSIjagodARezig - MOOD CONDITIONS FORUM. Many other teenage girls experience similar problems, but women advise that, as they mature, get more used to their changing bodies, their raging hormonal fluctuations, and their brains reach full development in early adulthood, and they find their way in the world, then things get better.



To: Dying inside...your not alone! i'm Going to help you in anyway i can. First thing is too not be around your parents go to ur friends house and hangout with the best possible ppl you may kno...good ppl will influence u and help "U" become a better person...it can get so good for u that you'll feel confident enuff to walk around ur house with no reason to be upset. Don't worry about them if they don't want to pay attention to u & especially don't worry about THEIR problems but mostly if nothing works for u at home ignore ur parents if they say something negative to u, don't let it get to u at all, it shows them that ur weak & u can take crap. I don't kno ur what kind of person u are or ur how yerr personality is but I can tell you that the fighting at home and money problems is not ur fault...stay positive.....and I'm not christian or N E thing but if u believe in god...pray at least 1 time every night for help and if yer sensere bout it persuit of happiness will come to you(:



you are wrapped up in so much depression, you cannot look to see the bigger picture. I ache for you. I know how horrible things can get and adding depression and family issues like the kind you are dealing with, it must be very hard. But you can make it. I know you can. Things will get better. But for now you have to live, one breath at a time. You need to focus on yourself not your mother. You need to do something for yourself. I know you probably don't want to. Please email me itchywater@att.net I will give you my phone number. I have been there and I can be there if you want to talk.



You sound like a really depressed girl who is going through way more than she deserves. You're self-injuring, attempted suicide and are thinking about doing it again. In my personal opinion I think you should be admitted, I know it's extreme and maybe it sounds crazy but I've been where you are, and it's exactly what I needed. What you're going through, you shouldn't have to go through by yourself. Call 911 or have your sister or somebody take you to the ER and tell them you're feeling suicidal, tell them you're not sure if you're going to do something stupid.

If you don't want to be admitted, although I recommend it, get someone to take you to the doctor or talk to the school counselor and TELL them you've been having suicidal thoughts, and you've been cutting. They need to get you help under law after that.

Good luck.




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