Obsessing over woman... (continued and still long)?!


Question: Obsessing over woman... (continued and still long)?
I saw her working out in the gym a couple times with one of the other trainers. As she worked, he often stood and stared at me. At some point, she would look over, and it seemed they would talk about me. She still watched me a lot in the gym. I was on the stairmaster a lot, above everyone else in the gym. She was always with a client. I would glance over out of the corner of my eye and see her talking to them, while looking around at me. I eventually paid for more sessions with her :/ (5 more). When she was with other clients, she watched me A LOT. And she didn't seem to think I noticed. She knew where I was when I moved throughout; when I changed areas, I saw her scanning the room before spotting me and looking back at her client. When on the stairmaster, she would stand and stare. I saw her one of these times look over her shoulder at her client and check the people at her side before looking back at me, as though making sure no-one saw her staring. I caught her checking out my a** while doing squats. I was facing the mirror and saw her kneeling with a client behind me, glance up at my butt, look at her client and look back at it.

She was friendly/sweet/flirty during some of these sessions and very unfriendly during others. She'd asked about my weekend (should've mentioned in first post) before and didn't give in to a simple "nothing much" answer. She asked another day(Fri) if I had plans for the day and I said maybe and she asked what, intrigued, and I said smiling "it's nothing" and she persisted and I was like "no, it's nothing. really" Annoyed. She stopped. She tried a couple times to introduce me to her friend but the girl was rude and wouldn't even look at me. My trainer had walked over, slapped the girl's a** with her clipboard and looked over at me smiling as she did so. I had looked away. She then said "this is..."

When I approached at the beginning of sessions, she began to act completely uninterested and somewhat irritated. I would say "hey" in a cheerful tone, and she'd ask how I was doing without looking at me or really looking like she cared. During the workouts, there was no talking. I brought up something once and she immediately became friendly/cutesy again. Another we got onto the topic of me moving around, and she was suddenly asking question after question, seriously but intently. I'd mentioned I was irritated because I thought I was going to be late one time, she asked why and I just said I didn't like being late. She turned her head and said "well, you're here now" in a soft/thankful tone and looked like she regretted her tone. Another, she'd called in a bored tone to let me know there was an earlier day open for a session. I was pissy, I'd simply said "no, that's not going to work" She said bye and then repeated it in a soft voice before hanging up. The last session, she did that "I'm getting hot" thing again (w/o mentioning the pills) and took off her jacket. She was quieter this time and nice. She started to put her jacket on later and I asked if she was cold again, and she didn't answer...I repeated and she said "it's comfortable" while looking at herself in the mirror with a shy smile and arms straight out at her sides. She went over to print out something for me at the end of it, and when she came to give it to me, she stood real close to me. I couldn't even lay the paper horizontally between us. She asked if I understood it, I was just like "ha, I'll figure it out" stepped away and turned to say bye. She didn't say anything but stood smiling weirdly at me.

I began trying to make eye contact. I passed her as she was with a client, looking at them with a slight smile. She was smiling hugely as she spoke and glanced quickly at me out of the corner of her eye. I then looked at her and her eyes darted back at me, to her client and back at me again. Later, a man was talking to me, he turned and faced her direction and I did as well as we spoke. And she noticed and seemed to think we were talking about her, she was suddenly really smiling again and glancing over. Later, when she glanced at me I held eye contact, and her eyes were wide and her mouth looked to have dropped slightly. She looked down at the equipment. I looked down, smiling, because I knew she'd look back, and she did.

A new gym opened. She transferred over there. Honestly, it is easier for me to get to, I don't have to walk a lot(I don't have a car), but I mainly chose because I knew she'd be there. I didn't see her much for a week or so, and I had been planning on asking if we could meet up sometime. I grew sick of waiting and just texted "Haven't seen you in the gym. I've wanted to ask if we could get together sometime." And an hour later she replied

Answers:

I didn't see your initial story, but from this I have a few questions. Are you physically attracted to this woman? I mean, are you wanting a relationship with her, outside of training and the gym? You mention she has a boyfriend; are you thinking that she is physically attracted to you? I am not sure what you are confused about...I think you are playing too much of a game. You asked her to get together, and then completely ignored her...of course she is going to get angry. I think you be completely honest with her about what you are wanting (unless you are not sure, and you tell her that). She was willing to get together with you, so if anything there is a friendship there...and while you continue to play a game, you may be losing out on a really great friend, or the relationship you are wanting from her. So...stop playing a game, and when you see her, say hey...when she looks at you, smile. There is no harm...here's the thing; if she sees you looking at her, guess what; she's looking at you!




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