How to build self confidence?!


Question: How to build self confidence?
I have no self confidence, and I know its bad.
-I'm ugly
-I'm fat
-I'm stupid
-I'm a loser
-I can't do anything right
-I'm not good at anything

Everyone else:
-Is prettier than me
-Has a better body
-Is smarter than me
-Has more friends
-Has common sense
-Have talents

This is how I feel. I hate my self, and have 0% self confidence. Thanks for the help.

Answers:

Regularly monitor your internal monologue (self talk): write down the negative ones: "I'm really ugly" and then the converse: "I'm fairly good looking", and next time you become aware that you are thinking the former, visualise, as vividly as possible, a big "STOP!!!" sign, and/or a stern faced person wagging a finger at you, and deliberately repeat 5 times, either aloud, in a big voice, if alone, or subvocally (to yourself, in your mind), the converse affirmation. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. Habits take about 30 - 40 repetitions to become established, with most people. Stop comparing yourself unfavorably with others, using the STOP sign: "I am a unique individual, with potential, and my own set of skills". Keep your head up, and look people in the eye, or on the bridge of their nose. Practice a relaxation method, daily, and when needed, such as: (free) http://www.drcoxconsulting.com/managing-stress.html or http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm Consider volunteering, even from home, at first. It will also provide a solid basis in reality for the daily affirmations: "I am a good person, who is valued by my community, because I ..(insert activity here).. See page B at 8m.com about volunteering

Read: "Building Self-Confidence for Dummies" by Kate Burton and Brinley Platts, & Self-Confidence: The Remarkable Truth of Why a Small Change Can Make a Big Difference by Paul McGee, & The Confidence Plan: How to Build a Stronger You by Timothy E. Ursiny, from your bookstore, or amazon.com. Learn to forgive yourself for your past mistakes, and failures, or inadequacies. Treat each person you meet as if she or he is truly important. (You'll be amazed how this works). Look the other person straight in the eye, or on the bridge of their nose. Train yourself to notice something you like or find attractive in the person. Listen! Teach yourself to develop good listening skills. Learn a way to remember the other person's name. Make up a little story, perhaps. If in doubt, simply ask for the name again 2 or 3 sentences into the conversation. An exercise which can help you is called: "Act as if." When in a social situation, act as if you are confident, and outgoing. Talk more, smile at everyone; ask questions, speak in a normal or excited tone. Watch some of your outgoing peers, and imitate their social behavior. Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit.

The first step in becoming more confident is to accept and like yourself. Make a list of all your good points, strengths, and achievements. Put it somewhere so you can easily refer to it, from time to time; perhaps on the refrigerator door, or print it; (large typeface, or capitalise) have it framed, and place in your bedroom, or in a position of prominence, such as on the television, or lounge room wall. By doing this, you are reminding yourself that you, too, have praise-worthy qualities like others. You will like, and feel confident about yourself after this. Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind.

85% of people are suggestible, to some degree, so you could either seek professional hypnotherapy, or more alternatives along such lines are at http://your-mental-health.8m.com/blank_25.html (view page G about BDD; weight loss; see pages P, & N. A study has shown that people who drink 3 to 5 cups of green tea daily (use no milk or cream) are more likely to lose significant amounts of weight in a matter of months. I have shed around 70 lbs using the above, 20 mns of walking daily, and "Hoodia Gordonii + Glucomannan" - Google supplies of it, or email me at woolbikini@gmail.com A lot of the stuff on the market is the wrong species, or there is too little to be effective) and hypnosisdownloads.com has: Feel Attractive Now, Stop thinking you're Stupid, and some on weight loss. Only use 1, or 2.



why you are thinking of yourself that you hate yourself , you love yourself first,don't think that you are ugly,stupid or something else.you are thinking like that means its yours mistake try to love yourself talk friendly with everyone. i trust you rather trusting anyone else surely you will be the best and the best person express yourself by doing any help to others, everyone will also loves you



You should not underestimate your self, you have to built a concept that you can do anything in your life what you want. Each and every one hav some demerits, but one can improve it by giving their best. Be satisfied with the effort you have done. Never feel bad if you are not wrong. where ever you be just think that you are the best among all. you can give the best, you have the best quality.



I feel like a total loser most of the time. I am being treated for depression, but I need a lot to keep me going, my friends, my religion, my hobbies, etc.

Do you have any friends who are good listeners? That can help a lot just to have someone to talk to.

It doesn't really matter how many friends you have. A few good friends are better than many friends who don't really care about you.



then fix it... it sounds like you have some major self deprication. I would seek counseling, I think that would really help.




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