Why am i bothered by my oldest brothers existence?!

Question: Why am i bothered by my oldest brothers existence?

for about 14 years (most of my life; im 20) me and my family have had to deal with my oldest brother robbing us blind to support his drug habit (hes been doing drugs since he was 15, and i never knew him as a brother) and when my dad finally left and my mom came back (they divorced and dad was supposed to stay to get the divorce notice, get his stuff and go; but he stayed for months and wouldnt do anything about my oldest brother and didnt pay all the bills) we kicked him out. hes dead to me and i wish he was dead, his very existence has never done anything besides cause mental (i hated having to keep everything locked up, and to this day i still worry that he might break in and steal everything if hes given the chance (we keep the doors locked and made it so the windows cant be opened)) and financial pain (foor a while all my parents did was just repace stuff). he keeps calling me from some unavailable phone number and it really bothers me, i would like to think that he no longer exists but its hard to when he keeps calling me. i think him and my dads yelling is a large part of why i got depressed and started cutting myself in the first place (i have been getting professional help and ive been on 20 mg celexa since 3 weeks ago, but im really struggling)

Answers:

Maybe the Celexa is starting to work, and that's why you're thinking about the source of your problems. At this point, you can't change your brother. If you don't want to take his calls, don't. You don't have to answer the phone when you suspect he is calling. I doubt that he'll change his behavior at this point. I have to wonder, though, why you have such strong feelings for him when you don't need him or want him around? Also, don't judge your junkie brother too harshly when you have your own problem with your compulsion to cut your own flesh. I imagine that most people would find cutting more baffling than simple drug addiction.

Look, just define some boundaries, quit complaining, and focus on your own life.

Just because you grew up in a toxic environment, does not mean you are condemned to endure it forever.

You are 20 years old. That is old enough to leave home, turn your back on the chaos and make your own life. Distance yourself from your family, work, get an education and create your own reality, free from drugs, intoxicants and excess drama.

Do not waste time regretting the childhood that was forced on you or letting the past bother you. Live each day as it comes and be open to the possibilities your life will offer.

Good luck!

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Why am i bothered by my oldest brothers existence?!

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