Do I have neurosis disorder?!

Do I have neurosis disorder?

I am normal, pysically. But my mind is overloading. Most of the times I can't explain myself.

I sometimes feel worried and feel down without any reason.

I don't have phobia, but I feel fright whenever I hear loud thunder.

I'm not spoiled, and I rarely beg for something. But when I do, I really mean it and I cry if I didn't get what I want, even for just a simple book.

When I lost something, I act so strange. Even for a ballpen, I cry to death and I always have speculations on my mind.

I am obsessed with one thing, oh no, one person. She's a singer, but I don't idolize her, i just... just her, I'm obsessed with her. *one more thing, i'm not a lesbian ok.

I have physical complaints too, I feel sick everytime... but I'm not. I used to have a good memory, but nowadays, I often forget lots of things.

Most of the times I'm depressed, alone and weak.

When I have intense feeling[this rarely happen], my hands get numb, not totally, but it's hard to move. Am I neurotic?

1 week ago
one more thing... these happens very often, I cry without a certain reason.
There is a reason, but I guess, because there are too many , I can't explain what it is.

last thing, I know and I understand I have a disorder, even though I never been through any mental tests. And I'm afraid of doing so,

Be evaluated my a professional and seek support groups for your condition.