I know i need help, but im scared...?!

I know i need help, but im scared...?

this is very embarassing to put online, but i dont know who else to ask...

i have been a cutter since i turned 14 (i am 18 now) and its gotten really bad lately, i tried stopping but my life gets so hectic, and i feel like i "have" to do it... (the longest i have went in between is a month) i KNOW i have to stop but i dont know how...

i know you all are thinking im crazy but im not, i know i have a problem but im scared to tell anyone cuz i dont want to get put into an instiution or anything or be labeld as the "crazy" girl... and i dont want my family to be disapointed in me if they find out...

i just dont know where to turn or what to do... any suggestions or advice would really be appreciated

First off...never be embarassed to ask for help when you need it. Some ppl think that asking for help is a sign of weakness, but really it is a sign of strength, admitting that you need help. Second off, no, you are not crazy, you just have a bad way of dealing with negative emotions. In order to be able to stop, you have to want to stop. You need to stop for your own reasons, not someone elses, do this for yourself. I know what you mean about having to do it, its like you cant breathe or function until you make those cuts...it is a horrible thing to have to hurt yourself and not be able to stop yourself. Just remember that you are not alone..I think about 3-5% of the US population cuts or hurts themselves. You sound a lot like me, i started at age 14 and im 18 now.... i stopped for 2 years, and started again last year... it sucks. The best way i've been told to stop is by going to therapy. Apparently they can help you deal w/ your emotions in better ways than cutting. Personally i write poetry when i really dont want to cut. I also like slashing notebooks w/ scissors, it give the feeling of u cutting urself w/o actually doing it.