B/F has depression and anxiety disorder. Help me understand..?!
Question:
B/F has depression and anxiety disorder. Help me understand..?
He takes meds for his disorders and is fine on a daily basis, but lately he hasn't been talking much. We have a long distance relationship and he recently told me that he doesn't call sometimes because he is in a "mood"; like a place he goes to in his mind because he is overwhelmed sometimes and I think depressed, so he doesn't call me. He seems to be fine at work and also with friends, but somehow it's different with me. I don't understand. He also told me his system burns out on the meds and he needs to change up to another med for his disorders throughout his lifetime and he needs to go to the doc. Can someone shed light on this for me? I love him very much, but I don't know if he is using it as an excuse because he doesn't want to talk to me or he truly has periods like this that I need to accept; that he just dosn't want to talk/communicate with me. For me on the outside, I'm just not sure what to think because usually I equate lack of talking to lack of interest.
Answers:
Hi, sorry to hear you're feeling bad. It is impossible to tell whether your boyfriend is being truthful or not. However, I think you have to assume that he is being truthful - afterall, thinking otherwise will add to your problems and not help the relationship.
In reference to his illness... it doesn't sound like he is improving at all. So why not suggest an alternative? It will show that you care and are interested in him.
Suggest he try Cognitive Behavourial Therapy - he can do this alongside taking his meds. CBT is proven to be the most effective thing for depression and anxiety. It takes a bit of work, but it is super effective. He can speak to his doctor about taking a course or he can take a course for free online at: http://www.livinglifetothefull.com/elear... (A ‘prettier’ version of this type of programme can be bought at www.thewellnessshop.co.uk). If he doesn't like computers, the best book is Dr Robert Burns, The Feeling Good Handbook. It basically teaches CBT and used by many psychologists.
Ultimately I think you have to visit him and ask him where you stand. Good luck!