Help serious?!

Help serious?

'm curious about my gf...she cuts herself...she used to do it in the past and stopped, she has loads of scars, and she still does it sometimes...she actually just likes it, she is very sensible and not depressed (no really she's not)...am I meant to do something about this?

2 weeks ago
oh and she doesn't usually want to talk about it. she definitely doesn't show it off. If it comes up she will talk a little but I can tell she's not interested in discussing it.

2 weeks ago
yeah but she hates doctors she had some bad experiences. she is so happy with life. always excited by little things, she is big on nature, sooo good with her family even though they're a lil dysfunctional they just have the best relationship.

There are multiple reasons why people cut themselves or self-injure in other ways, but none of them are good reasons or acceptable reasons. I will post an excerpt below from one of my previous answers regarding reasons, but to answer your question first, I'd suggest this. Let your girlfriend know that you care about her and because you do, it causes you pain and concern that she harms herself this way. Let her know that it isn't about the scars, but rather about the fact that it is painful to know that someone you love at times feels driven to injure themselves for some reason and that you wish she would stop and perhaps get help to find healthier ways of managing her feelings and coping with things because you love her and want her to be well. If she continues to self-injure and this does not encourage her to seek help or stop, leave it alone. Unless she realizes it's a problem and is motivated to stop, therapy won't help her. Sometimes another person's love and concern is enough to motivate someone to explore healthier behavior, even if it's only for your sake in the beginning.

Some of the reasons why people self-injure:

There are multiple reasons why people self-mutilate and each case needs to be explored individually. The most common reason is that it occurs in order to induce a dissociative state and assists people who have been traumatized with achieving a state of emotional numbness and you hear it described as soothing for them. The physiological basis for it stems from the release of endorphins-the brain's natural painkillers-which function much like opiates and dull the experience of emotional pain. Other reasons include the opposite rationale-people who feel numb emotionally and who have shut down will self-mutilate in order to feel something and remember they are alive. Some people, particularly those who are in abusive situations, injure themselves as a way to exert control over when and how the pain is experienced. Others do it for self-punishment and feel relief from guilt or shame and see the letting of blood as a way to purge themselves of guilt. It may be a way of re-enacting and attempting to master early traumatic experiences This often happens during a dissociative state where people are recalling experiences which were traumatizing and they feel a need to punish/purge themselves for what they often mistakenly believe they have done wrong. There are also folks who do it as a way to cope with unrelenting chronic physical pain from other sources as it creates an alternative pain that distracts them from the chronic pain (think of the principle behind how a TENS unit works). In more rare instances it can be a response to psychotic states where folks are responding to command hallucinations or believe they are purging themselves from some evil inside them. There are other less common reasons, depending on the form of self-mutilation (eye enucleation, castration, etc.) that tend to be symbolic in nature. But most commonly it is done in response to increased feelings of tension with which the individual cannot cope and it becomes a way for them to dissociate their emotional pain and achieve an emotional numbing. The goal of treatment is to fully understand the reasons that sustain the behavior and in the latter case (the most common) to help people develop affect tolerance and the ability to cope with and soothe their emotional pain in healthier ways.

As you can see, there are myriad reasons why people do this, and the endorphin release can become addictive once even the original stressor has stopped. Even if the person does not show outward evidence of distress and appears to be coping, it should be apparent that this is not a healthy way to deal with whatever circumstances or emotions are the triggers.