Do you really believe there is anything after death?!

Do you really believe there is anything after death?

I am about done here. I think I've over-stayed my welcome and I need to move on.

Long story short ...

Almost 2 years ago I should have died. I was suffering from multiple organ failure and my doctors gave me about 3 months. I was in the Hosp, on Dialysis, in liver failure and I was done. I made my peace then. I was discharged from the hospital to hospice and dialysis ready to go, but I got better. Now I owe half a million in Hosp bills because I had no insurance, they froze my accounts, my wife wants a divorce, I have no money, my job is in the toilet and I'm still unsure if and when my health will deteriorate angain.

Yeah, I'm a sad and pathetic loser whining on Yahoo answers but not looking for sympathy. If you make snotty remarks that's cool because at least I'll laugh. I've seriously had it! I made my peace before and was given a bit of extra time. I could not hack it. I'm ready to go now. But I really want to know your opinion. When I go, is there anything else?

2 weeks ago
My doctors have no idea what happened. I was tested for everything. They though I had an autoimmune disorder but that's not completely consistent. They thought Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis but again, That does not completely explain what happened. Everything in my body was wrong including a 40,000 WBC with no infection. they still have no idea what caused this or if it will happen again.

Bankruptcy won't help because I still have no money to live on now. I had $92,000 in liquid assets and they want that. I will hav no place to live, and I just don't really care anymore, When I was in th ehosp I spoke with the clergy and I was ready to go. I should have just requested max morphine and I bet someone would have done it because I was in serious pain then.

I just want to go, I know it sound overly dramatic. I guess I just want someone to talk to before I do. I'm deathly (bad pun) afraid of being alone and I don't like pain.

If you quit dialysis, and go crazy on your high potassium foods and your fluids, you'll give yourself a massive heart attack and die. One of my patients had terminal cancer and decided he'd had enough. He had a good dinner with his family, including a couple 2L bottles of Mountain Dew, mashed potatoes, fruits and vegetables, etc., and he died the next day. Just be sure that this is really what you want. Be sure to talk to your doctor and social worker.

There will be those who won't like this answer, but they should realize that this course of action isn't suicide. Really, it's just withholding medical care. It's like a cancer patient not wanting chemo, or a heart disease patient not wanting open-heart surgery. Sure, you die a lot faster, but in the end it's all the same.