A friend of mine has panic attacks. How can I help her?!


Question:

A friend of mine has panic attacks. How can I help her?


Answers:

sorry this is such a long entry, but it is from a book I am publishing, so I can't yet simply give you an online link.

It is good, so I hope it helps you:

Coping With Anxiety

Unfortunately, too many people fail to cope successfully with dysfunctional anxiety and only make matters worse.

You may do drugs, drink alcohol, or in some other manner alter your state of consciousness to avoid dealing with the anxiety provoking stimulus.

Obviously, these are only temporary solutions and are accompanied by unhealthy consequences. You not only keep your anxiety, but you now have a drug habit to boot.

So what does an Anxiety attack feel like?

Your heart starts to pound . . .You begin to feel dizzy or faint. . .You experience shortness of breath. . .You feel tingling or numbness in your hands and feet. . .You start to feel pressure in your chest. . .You think you may be dying or at the least having a heart attack. . .You think you may be going crazy. . .But you're NOT!

These are the classic symptoms of an Anxiety Attack. Millions of people scattered about the United States, not to mention other countries across the world, have them every single day. You may be one of them. Or you may know someone that is battling with this affliction.

Either way, you need to know how to help yourself, or someone you care about deal with Anxiety. And the best way to do this is through understanding what Anxiety is and offering them, or getting, the support they desperately need.

Who Suffers From Anxiety?

People who you would never suspect in a million years! In fact, Anxiety is such a widespread disorder that virtually ANYONE can suffer from it. Your Uncle Buddy, your Grandma Jean, your sister Annie, your neighbor Joe, your best friend Patti, or your brother George.

But, because Anxiety is one of those 'sweep it under the carpet', “embarrassment-type-I think-I-might-be-going-crazy” disorders, people don't like to talk about it. Or admit they are long time sufferers. Especially if you are someone always in the public eye, such as Kim Basinger.

Kim had a long, difficult struggle with an Anxiety disorder, and kept it a secret for quite a good portion of her life. You would never guess it to see her up on the 'silver screen' though would you? But she in fact has spoken out publicly about her battle with Anxiety in the hopes that this may raise awareness of this dreaded disorder.

Let us not forget also that Anxiety is believed to be an inherited disorder, although your mom or pop may not show the outward symptoms of it.

Remember, this is an embarrassment disorder, or one that makes the sufferer believe they are, or are going, crazy.

However, not every person who has experienced an Anxiety attack will develop a full blown disorder, but don't discount the fact that potentially they could.

Here's an interesting statistical fact for you. According to NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health) approximately 2.4 million adult Americans suffer from some form of Anxiety or Panic Disorder. That's about 40 Million! And, it is twice as common in women as it is in men.

Coincidentally, the major reason for people not knowing what is happening to them, or that they are suffering from Anxiety or Panic Disorder COULD be attributed to the fact that many cases reported began in adolescence. Therefore, a child may not be as affluent in describing what they are experiencing compared to the ability of that of an adult.

The key here is to listen to your children!! You would NOT want them to endure a childhood full of suffering and not even know the reason for it.

Another interesting fact to be aware of is that Anxiety attacks don't only happen when a person is awake! They can, and often do, happen while sleeping. How scary do you think that may be to wake up to? Indescribable would be putting it MILDLY.

What Is Anxiety?

Imagine being stood in front of a high speed locomotive and you are frozen solid to the spot. Unable to move, knowing what is about to happen, and can do NOTHING to help yourself escape. Now imagine being plunged into this scenario several times A DAY.

This is what it feels like for an Anxiety Disorder sufferer. Or as close as it can be described. The only difference is, there is no speeding train barreling towards you. It's unseen. And comes from out of no where. Without warning. Crippling you in utter fear. Sound intense? It IS.

The 'official' 'unofficial' description of Anxiety is a disorder in which the individual afflicted feels an intense, irrational fear and an impending sense of doom or dread.

What this means is that, in 'layman's terms', if you suffer from Anxiety Disorder, or any form of it, that you will be confronted with paralyzing fear for no apparent reason that will make you feel as if there is no possible way out of it. And you can experience this unprovoked fear at any time within the course of a day.

In addition to suffering from Anxiety Disorder, an individual may also have other common disorders that go hand-in-hand with it such as Depression, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Agoraphobia, or any other number of Phobias that make it all the more important to seek treatment for.

What Causes Anxiety?

Short and sweet? Everything and NOTHING! Reread the definition of it above. Now the picture should become a bit clearer. In most documented cases of Anxiety attacks, the patient rarely reports any event that would have triggered the onset of the attack itself.

Now, with that said, let me also explain that when an Anxiety sufferer returns back to a situation or setting where a previous attack happened, this could trigger another attack, just because they'll be reminded of how terrifying that first attack was, and unconsciously be thinking about it successfully triggering yet another attack! It's a vicious cycle of fear.

And the greatest fear of an Anxiety attack/disorder sufferer?
- To have ANOTHER ATTACK!
Of course the attack hasn't killed them, and most likely won't, but it can sure feel like you're dying at the moment when an attack is occurring though.

So, the greatest determiner of having an Anxiety attack is also your greatest treasure, your MIND. Even though you can tell someone that is having an Anxiety attack that "It's all in Your Mind", this usually comes out leaving them feel you are trying to be condescending to their plight.
Even though you don't mean it in that way, this is most likely the way it is received.

To be more 'clinical' about Anxiety, it is, in fact, 'all in your mind'. Many studies have focused mainly on two specific portions of the brain that are responsible for inducing feelings of fear and anxiety.

It is simply an unannounced trigger that sets off one's “fight or flight” defense mechanism, kicks in the adrenaline, and BAM! A full blown Anxiety attack is on it's way forward.

Many times, Anxiety is brought about due to increased stress from daily life. Bills piling up, children seemingly out of control, pressure from work, family, and other events can trigger this disorder bringing it to the surface of an otherwise “dormant” carrier of the genetic traits passed on by their parents.

What Are The Different Types Of Anxiety?

Anxiety/Panic Disorder
This is the form of the disorder that brings on sudden attacks that paralyze you with fear for no apparent reason. Of course there are absolutely underlying factors that cause these attacks, however, the sufferer rarely knows what those are, unless they seek professional help from a family physician or a clinical specialist who are equip to deal with this type of disorder.

Most common symptoms, or the symptoms of the attacks would be dizziness, feeling faint, increased breathing, pounding heart, tingling or numbing sensations in the hands and feet, fear of impending doom, a disconnection with reality, or a total lack or loss of control.

People that suffer from this disorder may honestly feel as if they are dying, having a heart attack, or losing their minds. These attacks can occur at any time, and even while the sufferer is asleep.

Anxiety/Panic Disorder is often connected with other serious disorders such as depression. Due to the fact that the attacks associated with this disorder are such terrifying events, the sufferer may make several trips to the local emergency room not really knowing the true cause as it may be difficult to get a correct diagnosis at first.

This disorder can be very debilitating to the sufferer and can extremely hinder their daily activities. If a sufferer experiences an attack while driving, they will avoid driving to avoid having another attack. This can be true of any type of daily activity such as grocery shopping, doing dishes, watching television, etc.

However, this form of disorder is the most treatable of all the Anxiety Disorders, and so an individual experiencing, or believe they are experiencing symptoms of this disorder should seek help and effective treatment through their chosen health care professional.

Social Anxiety Disorder
This type of disorder more commonly strikes when a sufferer is placed within a social setting. It is also referred to as Social Phobia and can be a very traumatic and debilitating disorder making it near impossible for one afflicted with it to be comfortable at any social gathering.

This includes everyday functions such as attending class, going out to dinner at a restaurant, or even going to work.

The person suffering from this disorder has strong self-conscious issues and may often times feel as if they are not welcome, or really a part of the social setting. They feel as if they are constantly being judged or watched by others for no apparent reason other than those things they themselves feel self-conscious about.

The social settings can be those that occur on a daily basis, or those that are rare occurrences, such as a party, public speaking events, etc. Often times, the sufferer will experience any of the following symptoms when placed in social gatherings: profuse sweating, trembling or shaking, feeling sick to their stomachs, inability to speak, or blushing.

A person suffering from this type of disorder can become so upset by an upcoming social event that it will plague them for weeks in advance working them into an anxious frenzy by the time the event finally comes around. In an attempt to 'self-medicate', a person experiencing this disorder will often times turn to alcohol or 'street' drugs to cope which leads to more disorders springing up.

This disorder usually happens sometime during early childhood or adolescence and continues on throughout adulthood. Treatment for this disorder can be accomplished through careful and consistent counseling and medication.

General Anxiety Disorder
This disorder is a heightened sense of anxiety or worry experienced on a daily basis. It is a chronic disorder that is continuous throughout the sufferer’s day.

They experience difficulty concentrating or constant, excessive worry about every day concerns with an inability to control those overwhelming feelings of worry. Symptoms can also include increased nervousness, irritability, fatigue or restlessness.

While not as extreme a condition such as Anxiety/Panic Disorder, it is still a serious illness that requires professional treatment from a qualified health care provider or counselor.

What Can You Do To Battle Back?

First and foremost, you MUST realize this Anxiety attack for what it is when you are having one. Understand that you are having an anxiety attack, and that it won't last forever.

Most attacks only last anywhere from a few minutes up to no longer than a half an hour, give or take. Even though it may be difficult, try to lie down and RELAX. If you can't lie down, sit still, close your eyes and focus on slow, even, breathing. This will help ease the symptoms somewhat. Not completely mind you, but enough that you can make it through.

The REAL trick in battling Anxiety is to redirect your train of thought. Keep yourself as busy as you can and let the thoughts of fear of an oncoming attack melt away. They will. And the more you practice this reversal of thought, the better you will get at it and be able to manage your Anxiety attack better the next time you feel one coming on.

If it becomes too much to manage on your own, you should seek medical assistance quickly. Don't feel stupid for having to call an emergency squad. That's their job! These courageous folks get calls like this all the time, so you shouldn't feel the least bit of embarrassment or guilt in needing their aid.

What Can You Do To Support Someone Suffering From An Anxiety Disorder?

How you provide support to them may help them to control their Anxiety to some degree. First thing is first. Never belittle or try to downplay someone's Anxiety Disorder.

Anxiety is a REAL disorder and should be respected as such. Don't just dismiss their episode as a one time event, or try and 'solve' their problem through rationalization.

You have to understand that when a person is actually going through an anxiety attack, rationality is not something they are concentrating on, or listening to.

This is an extremely frightening experience and no matter how much you'd want to, you cannot make this experience go away.

Only the individual who is HAVING the attack has the power to do this. Not YOU.

The absolute worst thing you can do is to act as if they are lying or acting to get attention. This is simply not the case. While you may believe this to be true because you have never yourself experienced the unrelenting terror of an Anxiety attack, that doesn't mean that it isn't happening to someone you care about.

Imagine for a second that you had witnessed a "physical" accident that your loved one or dear friend was a part of. Something you could SEE the outcome from. Wouldn't you do everything in your power to help them?

What if they were trapped inside a car that was on fire? What if they were trapped underwater and were drowning? You would want to aid them, wouldn't you? What if they had stopped breathing? Would you just stand around watching them pass away? Or would you do everything you could to administer CPR to them, even if you weren't sure you were doing it correctly?

While the above examples are extreme, sometimes, to an Anxiety sufferer, it absolutely feels like the end of their world. Just as if they are drowning in a sea of chaos and disparity, unable to pull themselves out.

Also, by attempting to ignore the Anxiety attack, you are probably contributing to another disorder that goes hand in hand with Anxiety
. . . Depression.

Instead of holding them down 'under water', try throwing them a life preserver the next time they have an attack.

How can you do that? Just be there for them. Let them know that while you may not understand what they are going through, you are there for them and will stay until they feel better.

Do NOT try and force someone out of an Anxiety attack. It could make the attack that much worse for them. Just let the attack happen naturally, and in most, if not all, cases, their bodies will help them come out of the 'hot' zone all on its own. And if it doesn't, get them to the nearest emergency room as soon as you can. Or call an emergency squad to take them.

Also, NEVER try and give someone suffering from an Anxiety attack any type of prescription drugs that have not been prescribed by their family physician. Getting them to a professional source, such as an emergency room or their own family physician for help is essential.

Where to Get Help for Your Anxiety
If you have exhausted all your own mental power to overcome Anxiety on your own, there is still help for you. The best course of action for you at this point is to seek out professional help through your trusted family physician. He will tell you what you should do and the best steps for you to take to have fulfilling life.

If you don't have a family physician, you can still get help for Anxiety through your local area mental health facilities. Places such as NetCare are equipped to deal with many different mental health disorders and illnesses, one of which is Anxiety and Panic Disorder.

Never think that you are going through this alone. There are millions of other people struggling with Anxiety just as you are every single day.

There are support groups, counseling services you should take advantage of, Anxiety related programs to help you make sense of and learn to control your Anxiety, and of course there are effective medicines your doctor can prescribe for you if necessary.

Here are some strategies to help manage anxiety:

Re-labeling
Taking note of the selective awareness method, you can re-label any negative experience as a positive one. All that is required is to focus upon the positive aspects rather than the negative ones.

If you have test anxiety, you could consider it an opportunity to find out or to show others how much you know.

Rather than conceptualizing an airplane ride as risking your life, you can re-label it as an opportunity to ride on a sea of clouds or to see your hometown from a totally new and interesting vantage point.

Environmental Planning
Sometimes it is appropriate to adjust your life and environment to avoid the anxiety-provoking stimulus. For those anxious in crows, living in a small town will probably be preferable to living in a large city.

Self-Talk
This technique requires some objectivity. You must ask yourself what the real risk is in the anxiety-provoking situation. Self-talk may be used to realize that people are generally polite.

They won’t boo or throw tomatoes. If they thought that you are absurd, they’d probably take listening so as not to appear rude.

The worst that could realistically happen is they won’t ask you back again. That would mean you’d have more time to do other things. That’s not so bad, at all.

Thought Stopping
As simple as it sounds, when you experience negative thoughts, you can shut them off. To employ thought stopping, you should learn deep muscle relaxation techniques.

Then, whenever you have anxious thoughts you want to eliminate, tell yourself that you will not allow these thoughts to continue, and use the relaxation method.

The pleasant sensations of relaxation will reinforce the stopping of anxious thoughts, as well as prevent these thoughts from resulting in potentially harmful physiological consequences.

Systematic Desensitization
Systematic desensitization involves imagining or experiencing an anxiety-provoking scene while practicing a response incompatible with anxiety. Widely used by psychotherapists, this method was found to be nearly as effective when people used it by themselves.




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