What's wrong with me?!

What's wrong with me?

I am generally a happy person, but not lately. I graduated college a year ago, got into a good career, I'm making plenty of money, my car's paid off, I've got a wonderful boyfriend... Well, mostly. Lately, I feel like he doesn't want to go out. We live together, so maybe it's just an adjustment thing. I also recently found out that I have mild cancer... It is getting removed in three weeks.

I should be on top of the world, but I feel like my life is falling apart. I can't eat, can't sleep. I haven't eaten more than a few bites here and there in the last week, although I take my vitamins regularly. I've lost ten pound in one week, which is great... but not very healthy. I feel like I am shriveling up and dying inside. I thought, maybe it's depression. Maybe it's my birth control. Maybe it's anxiety. Maybe it's just good, old-fashioned stress. I've tried talking to people about it, but it's not helping. I do not want to go on any medications, not that I should anyway, what

Well, having a cancer isn't helping and I speak from experience. I have a rare vascular event that is extending into my brain as well, so I can relate, even though I'm in remission for now. But you are on the fast track to depression and that concerns me. Generally speaking, depression becomes a problem if it lasts for two weeks or more or becomes a problem in a person's daily life. So you're one for two.

The question I have is why you are adamant against taking medication. Medication and therapy with a qualified psychologist can be very helpful in treating depression. But if you have an organic component to the depression, you really have to treat it with medication. Good luck and I hope you can get the help you need. And you and your boyfriend will be in my thoughts as you go through the surgery to remove your cancer.