Is it possible that my man was misdiagnosed with bipolar 12 years ago when he wa!


Question:

Is it possible that my man was misdiagnosed with bipolar 12 years ago when he was 34?

I was recently looking at old family videos and he seemed very normal and happy at 25years old, playing with our kids. This is the man I fell in love with. Confident and alive and fun and very capable. Approx 10 years later he got sad and was told he is bipolar and is now on a combination of meds and is nervous. He is now 46. Any real insight would be appreciated, we have been married for 19 years. Here's another thing, is it possible that his doctor is wrong? Maybe he was just depressed? Maybe the doctor took it a little too far?


Answers:

There's a lot missing in such a short summary of someone's history, but what comes through clearly is that you wish your husband was the man you married again. You wonder if maybe this was all a big mistake, and if someone took away the label "bipolar" and the meds, he would be as he was at 25 again. No, that's unrealistic fantasy.

"Nervous" can mean so much. Does it mean hypomanic? Anxious? Obsessive? Sure, it could mean all sorts of things. It takes a mental health professional to sit down with a person and decide that. Even a professional person's guess at that is worth very little. Does your husband want a second opinion? If not, will he let you see his doctor with him? Maybe he's told his doctor more than he's told you.

A second opinion might be helpful. Maybe he could see a psychologist for CBT or other therapy that might add to the benefit from the meds.

All doctors make mistakes, but the only basis you have for suspecting a mistake here is that your husband isn't 25 again. I'm sure there was a reason for him to be called bipolar 12 years ago. You don't include that. Sometimes other types of moodiness can be misinterpreted as bipolar, such as moods related to substance abuse. If you want reassurance that your husband is getting good care, then start with your husband's doctor, and see what he or she says. Then if you and your husband both want a second opinion, go ahead, especially if it's just been one doctor for 12 years. But your husband won't be 25 again.

I'm older than your husband and have bipolar disorder. I'm far from a raving lunatic. Most days people would think I'm a thoughtful, well-adjusted guy, now as well as when I was 25. But I can tell stories that leave no doubt that I'm bipolar. Does your husband not dwell on those stories with you, or does he have doubts, too? He's the first one you need to talk to, then his doctor, then others if you both want.




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