Why do I care what people think of me more than what I think of myself?!
Question:
Why do I care what people think of me more than what I think of myself?
I know not everyone is going to like me, at the same time I don't want to look bad in other peoples eyes. Its a no win situation.
Answers:
When I was in nursing school we had to learn this saying...Self esteem is not what I think of myself, it is what I think, you think, of me.
It is important to see yourself as other people see you. Otherwise you would be completely unaware and unaccountable for your actions. However, you also need to realize that other people have their own backgrounds, agendas, values that can taint their view.
I think it is important to realize what people think of you. Run it through your value system to make sure it coordinates with your values. Otherwise you can dismiss it immediately. Such as, if someone would look down on you for being a certain race...if you do not believe it is a fair judgement than dismiss it.
Look at the relationship you have with this person, personal or professional. Is it a valuable relationship to you? If so, or if it is a necessary relationship you may put more value to their opinion.
Then look at what their opinion is asking to you be. If the person is asking you to change a core value...then you may want to dismiss the opinion or maybe the entire relationship. If the person however, wants you to change for your betterment, and it fits with you values, and this person is someone you need in your life...take it as sage advice.
If you need to dismiss an opinion...forgive yourself...can't please everyone.