Lately as I have been going through therapy I have been asked to give up all my !

Lately as I have been going through therapy I have been asked to give up all my addictions.?

I have turned to alcohol, benadryl, weed, sex and well anything to distract me from the pain that I have. Now that Im trying to give up everything the pain is almost unbearable. Its kinda like being kicked in the stomach. I cry when I wake up in the morning and I cry on the way to work and I cry when I go to sleep. Does this pain go away? Im trying stop seeing my family for a bit because that is where a lot of the pain comes from and it just makes me realize how empty I feel inside. Also about how little love there is. I dont want to sound like Im complaining its just that I have had this pain ever since i was little.

Well, I know that kicked in the gut feeling. That "I lost everything that makes me feel safe and wanted" feeling. Namely, my addictions, which I have also just recently given up. I've had pain ever since I was a little girl, too. Long story short; bad things happened, never told anyone, finally, fifteen years later, have faced it. Now I have to let go of all the addictions I have, the ways I run from my pain. But half the time, it doesn't seem worth it, does it? The pain from feeling so lonely without your addictions makes you wonder if giving them up is a loosing fight. Like maybe the addictions were better.
Yeah, I get it. Totally. And, I don't know how you feel about this, but I'll tell you the only way I'm getting thought it. Day by day. Minute by agonizing minute. You may not believe in God, and that's fine. I don't want to preach, but the only way I've found any hope, any love, any chance for healing, is through Jesus. My prayers were so pathetic to begin with. Mumbling, babbling, I didn't even know what I was saying. I just wanted help to get through it, because it hurt so much. But He is there, even though half the time it doesn't feel like it. Even though half the time I don't believe in Him, I know I would never get through this without Him. I've come to see that I can't find love through my addictions or through my family or friends. They cannot love me the way God loves me. I haven't gotten through the pain yet. But now I have hope, and before I turned to Jesus, I didn't have any hope. I know this is long, and I know it might sound cliche, and I can't pretend that I know exactly what you're going through, but I hope that you will see that there is love in the world, there is hope. Like the song says, cry out to Jesus.
My prayers are with you, God bless.