I have a hard time getting over past events: I keep going over the same things.!

I have a hard time getting over past events: I keep going over the same things.?

I find that I think in negative pattern: slights that I didn't handle well, old relationships where I was foolish, mistakes that I made--same stuff over and over. I feel regret and shame at the same time. People can see it in my expressions. I find I waste a lot of time. Any coping mechanisms I can use? Xanax will perk me up a bit but that's not good to take all the time. Thanks.

Why do you have to medicate yourself over this? The past is the past. Don't let it drag you down. It will absolutely make you nuts. The ego loves to relive the past and punish you for mistakes. Get past it now. You can do this. Start doing things for other people, like volunteering for an organization that needs help. The best way to turn things around for yourself is to start doing stuff for other people. Start working on the present and the future. Like I said, you can do this. Start now.