Depression and ecstacy? - please don't judge...?!

Depression and ecstacy? - please don't judge...?

Hi everyone, I've been sliding further into a depression the last few months, and have attributed much of this to suppressed childhood trauma, a failed marriage and an ex who chipped away at my self esteem. However, I've also been taking ecstacy when out clubbing. My mum has told me that she thinks it is the drugs that have caused my depression and has begged me to stop using it. I have been prescribed anti-depressants by the doctor, and am yet to start taking them (bit scared).

I just read up about ecstacy and depression and apparently there can be a link, that the drug destroys transmitters in your brain and then they grow back all wrong, not being able to transmit seratonin properly.

I'm really scared now, what if I've permanently done some damage? What if mum is right and it's the drugs that have made me like this? Is it reversible?

All my friends have taken it for 8 years (me only 1.5yrs) & they are all OK, so I question whether it IS the ecstacy. Very confused.

Well either way, depression is going to hit you. Your going through a rough time and just need something to run away to and that's probably why you turned to ecstasy. I'm not saying its not the xtc but most of it was cause of your past experience. You taking the drug might make you think more of that factor but it's not all caused by it. I suggest you not to do the drug anymore, since it will ruin you in the long run and since you want to help yourself get through all this. Try not even taking the anti depressants and deal with it yourself. Studies say that they can increase your depression and make you think some crazy things such as suicide. But if your depression doesn't go away then try taking them. And if that doesn't work than maybe a therapist can help. We human being are very strong and I believe you can get through this.
Good luck =)