Im in the process of cutting off ties with my family.?!


Question:

Im in the process of cutting off ties with my family.?

Ive been in a lot of therapy and am beginning to realize why things are the way they are. Ive stopped drinking and have been getting some memories back some of which are along the lines of sexual abuse. Right now I am student and rely on my parents for some financial help. Now I have to turn things all around and try to get over what has happened. I have never been so confused ever and feel like I have been used all my life. Has anoyone confronted this problem? If so what helped you through it?

Additional Details

4 weeks ago
yes ive had some dreams and flashes of my father abusing me... still have a long way to go to actually remembering it .....scary stuff

4 weeks ago
stopping the drinking has made me realize i have been in some kind of pain for as long as i can remember and I just couldnt get to the bottom of it... i always thought there was something wrong with me or i thought i had dont something wrong


Answers:

I wasnt sexualy abused but believe I was mentally abused by my father, its difficult to explain a lifetimes problems in a few lines here, if I said he wouldnt make eye contact it doesnt sound much but there was an atmosphere you could cut with a knife, I used to think it was my fault of course & he used to get kicks out of putting me down ignoring me & his scarcasm was terrible - the thing was I never saw how destructive he was in my life - to the outside world though he was perfect he had this mask which came of behind closed doors - he was very confusing in his thinking he would say what Id describe as opposites for eg...Adolph Hitler was an evil evil man...not to my dad I admire him for alot of what he achieved he would say, I never worked out if he was just being awkward or he really believed it, anyway a chilhood of him really messed me up & fearfull of people in general.
After Mum died about 10 years back he was suicidal & I felt sorry for him despite everything he was still Dad ....(if ur in the UK & remember Steptoe & son he had got this old man routine perfected of controlling/ knowing which buttons to press to get my sympathy & use me)......it wasnt until recently in adult life I have looked back & seen how bad things have been.
It has & is still @ times difficult but through a church group & a nice bunch of people I found a much greater Father in God he only has your best interests at heart ,he is my rock & guide in life & I know will never reject me slowly I have become a better & slightly happier person since by having God in my life & I'm slowly leaving all the bad &negative stuff in the distant past.
I hope God will help you, it took ages for me to open up & trust a few people but its the best thing I ever did.




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