A few people think I have an alcohol problem. Others don't. What do you think?!

A few people think I have an alcohol problem. Others don't. What do you think?

- I'm 22 years old and in graduate school.
- I almost never drink enough to get hangovers.
- I drink 3-5 nights per week.
- Drinking does not interfere with school or work responsibilities.
- It's not putting me into debt.
- I drink only high quality beer (1-2 bottles) on weekdays.
- I don't drink hard liquor or wine.
- I prefer to drink my beer alone, listen to music, write, and relax.
- I look forward to the beer. It's really good beer. (top-rated Belgians, trappists, imperial stouts, imperial IPAs)
- Friends who don't drink very much (quantity or frequency) are a little worried.

Don't respond with a question, "Do YOU think you have a problem?" Obviously I go back and forth between justifying/minimizing and thinking it's an issue. That's why I pose the question here.

Does it sound like a problem?

4 weeks ago
Okay, we have 7 who say it's a problem, 10 who say no it's not, and 5 on the fence.

It wouldn't be called alcohol dependence. The dependence, if you must call it that, would be purely psychological (not chemical, the way DSM-IV states).

Good points about quality/hangovers/debt being irrelevant. Just wanted to indicate the extent to which it doesn't appear to be interfering with social/academic/occupational functioning.

I told myself I'd stop drinking on weekdays a couple weeks ago. I've managed to do that without any problems or physical withdrawal, but "relapsed" and had a couple beers a couple nights when I was bored.

On the surface it does not appear to be a problem. There isn't sufficient quantity, frequency or dysfunction to warrant concern which means that it is a little unusual that you would be asking this question. That is the first red flag.

It seems a little unusal that friends would be so worried about 1-2 beers 3-5 nights per week. It isn't something one would even necessarily notice (particularly at 22 in college- the peak "beer years"). But perhaps there are some nights that it gets out of hand? How much consumption on the weekends? How often the hanovers?

Maybe you are giving them hints that it is something to notice.
Why prefer to drink alone. Would drinking with others be less attractive? Do you find that you are missing out on social opportunities? For example, passing up a get together so you can go home a enjoy your beer. Do you provide the same pattern of excuses to others or yourself (e.g. I just need to go home and unwind).

The fact that you emphasize the "high quality" of the beer suggests a need to make some rationalization for your drinking. There is nothing wrong with looking forward to a Budweiser.

Do these red flags seem like you have a problem. Yes and no. Many people with an alcohol problem would have these red flags, but you could have another problem as well- more in the relm of being obsessive or maybe even a bit hypochondrical if we are truly only talking about 3-5 beers per week. Maybe the concern about the beers is a red herring and the real concern has more to do with a social phobia. Drinking can often be a form of self-medication, but of course, eventually it can take on a life of its own!!

So if you are concerned enough to be asking the question, then heed the warning. Something is very likely to be going on that requires some attention.

Start with a professional therapist. Explain your concerns. Invest a couple of sessions to get a professional answer.
It is likely to be the best investment that you will ever make!