How do we get through this again with so much hurt?!
Question:
How do we get through this again with so much hurt?
Married life was bliss. Had children - unfortunately first one had health problems in/out of hospital from 7 mths - 4 years.
2nd child born. No family support or love. His Dad died. Excluded from his Dad's will. He hated his job. His depression led to violence. I got depression. Marriage on rocks.
2 years later turned around. New job. Health ok ish. Things looking up - several months of happer times. Looking to future.
Then 1st child already gone through hell when tiny had bad accident at school. Permanent facial scars.Stress excerbated as school handled situation badly. Injury/possible school/house change has plunged us both in depression.
He is in denial but needs help. Won't see anyone/take anything. Violence and 'I hate you so much' etc comments start from him again.
I know he's depressed but I've been terribly hurt mentally.
My love for him is now so confused..I can't take much more.
Answers:
Oh I am really sory to hear this. I really do empathise with you. I have been through a really bad patch with my husband, but thankfully we seem to have come out the other side now. I suffer with depression,and although my husband won't admit it I think he does too. The first thing you should do is see your GP, try to get referred for counselling both for yourself and for you as a couple. I really believe that talking makes a massive difference. Bottling things up makes you ILL.
I found it impossible to talk to my husband and it got so bad that we were just co-existing in the same house because of our two children. I used to get the same stuff screamed at me too. I think I got so much worse because I didn't tell ANYONE at all about anything, I just kept it all bottled up. I just thought that my life was never going to change. Then after a number of months in Day Care and lots of CBT, group therapy and medication, I am feeling a lot better and my relationship with my husband is great.
Wishing you all the luck in the world,and if you ever need to offload or just chat to someone anonymous then drop me a line through the link on here.
Take care of yourself, I am sure you will find your happiness again. x