I need to build up my confidence? Been down with substance abuse for long. All T!
Question:
I need to build up my confidence? Been down with substance abuse for long. All Tips are welcome?
Additional Details
1 month ago
I am a 27yo man
Answers:
Ash - Substance abuse is about trying to fill up that "empty" feeling (the feeling of "I am not good enough") inside of yourself.
To fill up the emptiness inside and feel more confident, STOP CRITICIZING YOURSELF FOR ANYTHING and/or EVERYTHING, NO MATTER WHAT.
Make a list (WRITE IT DOWN) of all the negative things you say to yourself, all of your self-criticisms. Then go over the list and try to figure out why you criticize yourself for that and when you started. You will find most of your SELF-criticisms originally came from someone else criticizing you and now you are just repeating what they said. Ask yourself if the criticism is really true. If it's not true than stop criticizing yourself about it. If it is true, and you WANT TO change it (say you're sloppy and want to be neater) than make the change and stop criticizing yourself for it. If it's true and you DON'T WANT TO change it or cannot (maybe you think you're too short or too tall), then stop criticizing yourself about it.
Also, do not criticize other people for any reason. Our outer life is a mirror of what is going on inside of us. The things that you like and accept about other people are the things that you like and accept about yourself. The things that you do not like or do not accept about other people are the things that you do not like or do not accept about yourself. When you find yourself criticizing someone else, look inside and see where you are criticizing yourself.
The same goes for comparing yourself to others. Either they seem better than you (she's so pretty, he's so smart) or worse than you (he's so mean, she has no manners). Either way, it is a way of criticizing yourself.
Finally, take a little time each day to tell yourself that you love yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and look yourself in the eye and tell yourself that you love yourself. Doing this will bring all of your negative thoughts, feelings and beliefs about yourself to the surface, and may even make you cry. Again, write down your negative thoughts/feelings about yourself and ask if those are true. It may take some time, but if you are consistent you will begin to feel the love you have for yourself and have more self confidence..