Numbness after the death of a loved one?!


Question:

Numbness after the death of a loved one?

Hello, all:

My mother died on June 3rd from complications of lung cancer. We'd known she had cancer for about ten months, but her decline was sudden and very unexpected given that she'd just been told by her oncologist that she had about six more months.

I mostly feel numb, and my question is this: Is this normal, or one way that grief can go? I've only cried once since she died, and the rest of the time I just feel tired, distracted, and vaguely pointless. No painful sorrow. No longing for her presence. Just a calm that also makes me uneasy, because I'm afraid of what's going to happen when it breaks.

Thank you for your time.


Answers:

My Mother died when I was seventeen, I don't know how 'numb' I actually went but, I forced myself into numbness by heavy drug use for about ten years. I just didn't want to feel any of it, and I didn't. After I stopped, I finally grieved. I went through a LONG depression but, at the end it was worth it.
Everyone grieves differently, don't worry that you're not doing it 'right'. Our minds process things at different rates and stages. Not everybody follows a 'book'.
I'm sorry for your loss. You will feel this for the rest of your life, don't rush the grief. It will come when it is ready.
)o( Blessed Be!




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