How much time & space does a man need to get himself together?!
Question:
How much time & space does a man need to get himself together?
I met the most amazing man ever! Love at first sight! He swept me off my feet like that of a fairytale. Only a few weeks later he expressed his co-dependency on pain pills/alcohol & he decided to quit cold-turkey which led to depression. I had nothing but love, support & patience for the man, however we had our first and only bump in the road & he completely shut me out & cowardly advised me that he needs time & space to take care of himself. I don't want to lose him, but I'm not sure what his intentions are with me and/or his addiction. How long should I wait? Is there anything I can do to help him? I don't want to push him further away, but its killing me to know he's alone & hurting. Is his love for me 'real' or are the drugs/alcohol playing a role in his emotions?
Answers:
Having some of the same feelings when it comes to not wanting others watch as I try to regain myself. A man really doesn't want you to see him both vulnerable and down on himself.
The man you fell for is there but, he was also hiding with pills and alcohol. Maybe he is afraid you won't love the real him. Give him time to recover and if it was meant to be it will be.
Recovery is important and more successful without the added pressures of a relationship. Try to go to Al-Anon and see what they might suggest for you to try to be both supportive and non-pressuring in his struggle to regain himself.