How should i go about this?!

How should i go about this?

im a bpd sufferer, have been through alot of trauma in my life, i have big problems with intense feelings of rage, and controling myself from having an outburst, ive had this problem for years and years, in years gone by, i would used to set out to go out, than whilst outside, my rage would build, and i would get paranoid to, it used to end up with me completly losing control of my rage, and id shout and physically hit things and become abusive to people i dont no in the street.
ive been through alot of pain and trauma and people have caused me alot of pain in my life, and ive developed a persecution complex, where sometimes the notion people are against me is strong..
controling my rage has improved, but theres days like today where the feelings come back strong, and im so wound up and angry, i cant stop myself from clenching my teeth, im also full of worry and anxiety constantly to.
i have to go out today and get things done, but im worried because i dont wanna lose control

1 month ago
of my anger, im so worried about putting myself in trouble and jeapordy..im so full of anxiety because of it, because i dont want to completly flip and lose control..the rage feelings are really strong today...but at the same time i have to go out and get things done, pay bills etc. im waiting for therapy, but im in a list.
has anyone got any tips on what i can do?

I have a friend who has a similar problem. He is actually a very nice guy, friendly and pleasant and is well-liked by most people. Unfortunately he has scared off a few friends with his erratic behaviours.

About a year ago the doctor put my friend on Effexor. I've seen a difference since then. He seems to be in better control of his anger. His outbursts are less frequent, way less intense, and he gets over his anger fairly quickly.

I can't say if the same medication would work for you, but it's certainly worth a try to talk to your family doctor. There may be a medication that would help calm you, so at least you can go out and look after your business.

I'll pray for you, that God will put the right people in your path, to help you on your healing journey.