At what point do you say Okay, you're on your own?!

At what point do you say Okay, you're on your own?

I have an adult daughter, who within the last two years and attempted suicide 4 times. Each time it's at a holiday or family event, that takes us from what we need to be doing with our families and we end up focusing on her. This time we had taken a weenend to search for a home for our grandmother, who has Alzheimers. Once it was just after I was injured in a serious auto accident, once Christmas Day. This time it was because her fiance told her he had to use money intended for her ring to pay off court ordered fines. We didn't rise to the occasion to pay her rent this month, either. So, now we are on Day 4 of ICU and she will probably be sent back to the State Hospital. Lost a good job that she loved! I just can't keep doing this!!

Make sure she has good psychiatric care. And, get excellent counseling yourself. Skip family group therapy. It's just another way for her to drag you down with her, which is partly what she's trying to do. It's called "Tough Love", and you know what that is. Cut her loose. Let her sink or swim. It's probably from NOT cutting her loose when it was time to and hobbling her transition into independence that screwed her up in the first place. But, people have been more screwed up by families than that and they rise above their problems because, the truth is, everyone has to take that step alone toward self-sufficiency eventually. Let her do it, one way or another. But, disengage.