Is it ethical for a person with a mental illness to have a family?!


Question:

Is it ethical for a person with a mental illness to have a family?

I sometimes think I'd like a family, but I feel like I'm not well enough to take care of children or be a good spouse. I know I would only end up being a burden on them, draining away any chance of a normal life for them, so I'm trying to talk myself out of a family. What does anyone think who has lived with someone with a mental illness? (If you don't know about this stuff, don't answer.) Thank you.

Additional Details

1 month ago
I forgot to mention: I'm talking about the possibility of adopting. I would consider it completely unethical to ever have biological children. I would never do this to a child.

1 month ago
If I'm not good enough to have children, I wouldn't inflict myself on an innocent animal either. Presumably I will get better and stabilize, but at sometime in my future, my medicines will quit on me again, so yes, I'm treated, and at the moment it's not working.

1 month ago
I don't have a spouse. I refuse to even date until I've resolved this. I don't want to drag a potential wife through this train wreck any more than a child.


Answers:

It would depend entirely on the severity of the metal illness. You seem perfectly able to reason out the consequences of your decisions, and seem to have understanding and empathy for those who have cared for the mentally ill, - That is more than most people are capable of doing, so perhaps you should reason out the strengths and weaknesses of your case before coming to a decision.

There have been perfectly normal, intelligent and healthy children reared by mothers suffering from bouts of clinical depression, or mild cases of schizophrenia. If your illness can be controlled well with medication, then I don't see why you should deprive yourself of the joys and trials of parenthood.

I know full well how incredibly devastating it can be to be living with someone with a mental illness. It can drive the most patient, reasonable, and sane person completely up the wall. :). But even knowing this, if the illness is not severe enough to hamper your chances of being a good parent, I would give it a chance. I think it would be very important to let your partner know how you feel, and take his feelings into consideration too.

Your introspection shows me that you're more than good enough to be a prospective parent, in my opinion.

Good luck.




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