How do I get my man to at least consider quitting smoking?!
Question: My boyfriend had his first cigarette when he was 20 or so years old and almost 40 years later, he's still smoking like a chimney. I am greatly concerned. I've seen what kinds of long term effects cigarettes can cause. Not to mention the fact that kissing him is like kissing an ashtray! Sorry to be cliche, but seriously!
I've voiced my worries to him, but he seems to not care. And instead of cutting back, he's smoking MORE. He's doing at least a pack a day. What should I do? Should I be persistent or should I back off? I don't want anything bad to happen to him.
Answers: My boyfriend had his first cigarette when he was 20 or so years old and almost 40 years later, he's still smoking like a chimney. I am greatly concerned. I've seen what kinds of long term effects cigarettes can cause. Not to mention the fact that kissing him is like kissing an ashtray! Sorry to be cliche, but seriously!
I've voiced my worries to him, but he seems to not care. And instead of cutting back, he's smoking MORE. He's doing at least a pack a day. What should I do? Should I be persistent or should I back off? I don't want anything bad to happen to him.
Cut off the sex.
Eh, not really. Coercion tactics rarely work, and besides, then you're not getting any.
It's tough. If somebody who has been smoking that long doesn't really want to quit, that's pretty much all she wrote. I mean, even if you DO have a strong desire to kick the habit, it's notoriously difficult. People who are facing obviously alarming heath issues head-on as a result of their smoking still can't quit, even with every kind of aid.
So I don't have much useful advice...lol. Does he see a doctor regularly? It could possibly help if he got a lecture from a strictly medical POV.
PS - my parents and a few of my friends have tried that depression medication that they're prescribing now as a stop-smoking aid, with varying degrees of success. I can't say I recommend that, though. There's something a little frightening about giving people drugs to kick a drug habit, especially considering that the medication in question probably began life as an anti-seizure med or something.
you really cant. he will only quit when he is ready to.
I gather he is, from what you say, around 60 years old. At his age, and having smoked for as long as he has, it is going to be nearly impossible to get him to stop smoking---in fact, there is nothing *you* can do to get him to stop. The only person who can convince him to give up cigarettes is himself, and until he is ready to do that, nothing you can say or do is going to make any difference.
You could threaten to cut him off - that might do it.
Surely he knows the risks. If he would like to, but can't, tell him to go to a doctor and get a prescription for Chantex (I probably spelled that wrong). A PA I know told me that she hasa prescribed it something like 70 times, and so far has had a 100% success rate with it! And a friend of mine also took it, quit smoking, and told me he had absolutely no side effects whatsoever.
CALL THE SMOKERS QUIT HOTLINE 866-697-8487
Coercion works well, withhold sex, and other favors ....
I quit a week ago (three cigs a day now) and it sucks (pardon the pun). I want a cigarette every five minutes and it takes everything I have to say NO. My husband made fun of me and said that he was 100% SURE I couldn't do it. I just HAVE TO prove him wrong!
My grandfather smoked 2 1/2 packs a day until he died at 92...and he had smoked since he was 12...
The thing is, you can NOT make him stop smoking...its up to him to stop...I gave it up a very long time ago, and it was one of the hardest things I had ever done...But it was ME that wanted to stop smoking...
You really need to back off...and NOT push him here...and see what happens...
Tell him the nooky patch is closed till he quits smoking. That should work!!!!
Probably no,but you can still let him know that quitting well be very beneficial to him in a lot of ways. But when he decides he is going to he will. It takes a lot of will power to quit something like that and some people does not have much but if made up his mind his going to do it he is going to. He is the only one who can decide that for himself.