Why has my fiance lost his sex drive?!
Question: Been together for two years. and in those two years we've had sex.. ALOT. nearly once a day
we took a little break around christmas where we saw other people and he ended up getting a girl pregnant.
now ever since.. we never have sex. and when we do, i swear.. its less than 3 minutes long. i'm so frustrated cause i never get off now.
I don't know what to do. I've tried EVERYTHING i can think of. from sexy outfits to just leaving it alone and waiting for him to come to me. He doesn't. He just says "I'm not horny, get off" basically.
Am i missing something? We're both stressed.. but no more than we ever were. and the girl he knocked up and him have already agreed that he's signing over his rights as a parent. so i don't believe that's bothering him any
What can i do?
Answers: Been together for two years. and in those two years we've had sex.. ALOT. nearly once a day
we took a little break around christmas where we saw other people and he ended up getting a girl pregnant.
now ever since.. we never have sex. and when we do, i swear.. its less than 3 minutes long. i'm so frustrated cause i never get off now.
I don't know what to do. I've tried EVERYTHING i can think of. from sexy outfits to just leaving it alone and waiting for him to come to me. He doesn't. He just says "I'm not horny, get off" basically.
Am i missing something? We're both stressed.. but no more than we ever were. and the girl he knocked up and him have already agreed that he's signing over his rights as a parent. so i don't believe that's bothering him any
What can i do?
stress can have a big impact on a man's sex drive. all those crazy feelings associated with being a father and basically dumping his kid are obviously still stewing in him, and they may continue for a long time. that type of thing can have a big impact on someone's life. he may be angry, unsure if he did the right thing, or thinking about what will happen in the future, for example, whether the kid will want to come back into his life. maybe he feels bad that a little piece of him is in another woman. you never know.
every relationship has its ups and downs - and the bedroom is not excluded from that. i've been with my fiance for three years, and sometimes he goes through a rough patch like this, over stress in the relationship, a crisis at work, or whatever. he just didn't want to have sex, no matter how hard i tried, and like your man, would just say 'get off, i'm not in the mood.' and no matter how bad you want it, you have to respect that. if he says he's not in the mood, don't push. be prepared to be satisfying yourself for awhile. you have to be the strong one here.
try being more of a friend to him. talk to him about it, and listen. he may not want to talk about it for awhile, so don't pry. just let him know that you're there for him when he's ready - you're engaged, so you've made it clear that you'll be there for the long haul. there's this myth out there that guys want it all the time, and it's just not true. i know it can be frustrating - you may think it's your fault or that you can do something to fix it, but you can't. you just have to wait until he feels better about what he is going through.
it should pass in time. just be there for him, and hang tight.
lose some weight, I am a guy and I think that if my wife had sex with another guy, i would not have with you either
just stick by him in the mean time i would buy ur self a vibrator! : )
He has shown what kind of parent he will be for your child. Why are you chasing this loser?
He obviously has some underlying problems, and they obviously started after he got that girl pregnant.
There's really not much else you can do other than talk to him. Ask him if he's still interested in being with you... Because a relationship certainly can't work with sexual tension.
Umm, obviously you should hold off until he feels like it. Ask him to tell you when.
So, 2 years...I read that the first two years of a relationship are "the most" firey, and then, of course, it dies down just a bit. Things neutralize. But as long as the love is still there, it's no danger to the success of the relationship.
What can you do to bring it back? Nothing. It's his sex drive, not yours. He probably can't help it -- you can't stay enthusiastic forever. If he wants it to come back, it might come back subconsciously, once you both stop pressing each other for it and focus on other things between you. Like how he's accidentally become a father!
This relationship could seriously go downhill if it is built upon such superficial factors. Sex is only an aspect of your intimate relationship. You have to take care of the whole picture for its individual parts to work. So for your relationship to last, you need to build it up on more than just sex. O_o From your question, I can infer that you probably don't. (If you do, ignore my answer ^^;)
You can be like a friend, you know. Don't you have other 'fun' things to share together? I mean, that's how it works for successful marriages (since you are fianc