My boyfriend's Porn "addiction"? or is it...?!
Question: My boyfriend's Porn "addiction"!? or is it!.!.!.!?
My boyfriend spends HOURS downloading and looking at porn online!. He recently admitted that he masturbates to it, too!. Our sex life is slowly tapering off, he says he's sick, or not in the mood, etc!. BUT, he also assures me he finds me sexually attractive and that it's just something he needs and wants to do!. It seems like he may be substituting porn for the "real" thing or is this just some harmless habit (he's been doing it for years, as he's lived alone many years)!. It has made me feel a bit "less than"; because he has a real woman here that would be open to almost anything!. Any advice!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Investing hours of your time searching for porn is not a harmless habit!. It's an illness therefore unhealthy for him and for those around him!. It contaminates your relationship!.
And this answer is coming from someone who occasionally watches porn and whose boyfriend watches porn!.
For what you say, he invests more time and effort building his porn filing system than building a more meaningful relationship with you!.
Your concerns are totally founded!.
Usually men (and some women) watch porn, masturbate, etc in addition to enjoying a sexual intimate relationship with their partner but not as a substitute!.
Sometimes they watch it to get new techniques, learn dirty talk, visual stimulation, curiosity,, and also to relieve themselves if you are not around!.
You are not the problem here because masturbation and porn addiction began probably way before he met you!.
My boyfriend told me he first masturbated when he was 13 yr!. old, he is 46 now!.
For example on Fri!. I couldn't go out and I asked what he did and he said " i just watched a little porn"!. I was joking and told him i assumed he gave himself a happy face!.!. he responded yeaah but i can't wait to be with you!.
He is open about it and I respect him more for that!. The difference is that he does it maybe once a week so his day it's not taken by porn only!.
Sometimes this addictions began because of lack of goals, ambition in life!.
See, you are hurting and he doesn't feel your pain, that's selfish!.
You gotta reconsider your relationship with him, don't forget you are giving him the best years of your life and in exchange you are getting neglected and more grief than joy!.
And it isn't fair to you because you can't compete with fantasies or paid actresses (which they are putting on a show anyway)!.
He lost connection with you but mostly with himself, with his emotions!.
To him is less intimidating and more self gratifing to have sex with a picture than with a girl who offers him mind, body and spirit!.!?!. What guy in the right state of mind would do that!?!?
My advice is: don't make excuses for him, don't lose yourself to make him happy, whoever loves you won't make you do that!. Any guy you meet, whether they tell you or not you can assume they watch porn every now and then and they do masturbate!. Don't panic over that, they start at a young age, testosterone ,etc!.
Now your bf's porn habits are not going to stop because you ask or give ultimatums!. So ask yourself what are you getting out of this relationship!. Did he tell you if he is trying to persue a career in the porn industry such as producer or something or is it because stimulates a sexual response on him!? I think either way you are being emotionally and physically neglected right now and you are gonna get distant and uninterested!. We only make one trip through this life, this is it, and i'm sure there's someone out there looking for someone just like you!. Hope I don't sound harsh!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
And this answer is coming from someone who occasionally watches porn and whose boyfriend watches porn!.
For what you say, he invests more time and effort building his porn filing system than building a more meaningful relationship with you!.
Your concerns are totally founded!.
Usually men (and some women) watch porn, masturbate, etc in addition to enjoying a sexual intimate relationship with their partner but not as a substitute!.
Sometimes they watch it to get new techniques, learn dirty talk, visual stimulation, curiosity,, and also to relieve themselves if you are not around!.
You are not the problem here because masturbation and porn addiction began probably way before he met you!.
My boyfriend told me he first masturbated when he was 13 yr!. old, he is 46 now!.
For example on Fri!. I couldn't go out and I asked what he did and he said " i just watched a little porn"!. I was joking and told him i assumed he gave himself a happy face!.!. he responded yeaah but i can't wait to be with you!.
He is open about it and I respect him more for that!. The difference is that he does it maybe once a week so his day it's not taken by porn only!.
Sometimes this addictions began because of lack of goals, ambition in life!.
See, you are hurting and he doesn't feel your pain, that's selfish!.
You gotta reconsider your relationship with him, don't forget you are giving him the best years of your life and in exchange you are getting neglected and more grief than joy!.
And it isn't fair to you because you can't compete with fantasies or paid actresses (which they are putting on a show anyway)!.
He lost connection with you but mostly with himself, with his emotions!.
To him is less intimidating and more self gratifing to have sex with a picture than with a girl who offers him mind, body and spirit!.!?!. What guy in the right state of mind would do that!?!?
My advice is: don't make excuses for him, don't lose yourself to make him happy, whoever loves you won't make you do that!. Any guy you meet, whether they tell you or not you can assume they watch porn every now and then and they do masturbate!. Don't panic over that, they start at a young age, testosterone ,etc!.
Now your bf's porn habits are not going to stop because you ask or give ultimatums!. So ask yourself what are you getting out of this relationship!. Did he tell you if he is trying to persue a career in the porn industry such as producer or something or is it because stimulates a sexual response on him!? I think either way you are being emotionally and physically neglected right now and you are gonna get distant and uninterested!. We only make one trip through this life, this is it, and i'm sure there's someone out there looking for someone just like you!. Hope I don't sound harsh!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
There are multiple questions here --
Does he have a porn addiction -- I personally do not believe porn "addictions" exist -- like sex "addictions" they are interesting ideas that allow some psychologists to make more money off guilty feeling men!. Everyone I know (including protestant and evangelical ministers) look at porn!. Some of them openly and with no problem, others with guilt and sadly with shame -- but all of them do it!.
Most healthy men (straight or gay) want both a fantasy life, including regular masturbation - and sex with a partner!. Some lie about the desire for both -- but it is present in every male I've ever known, and I've known a lot of males!.
Kind thoughts,
HermesWww@Answer-Health@Com
Does he have a porn addiction -- I personally do not believe porn "addictions" exist -- like sex "addictions" they are interesting ideas that allow some psychologists to make more money off guilty feeling men!. Everyone I know (including protestant and evangelical ministers) look at porn!. Some of them openly and with no problem, others with guilt and sadly with shame -- but all of them do it!.
Most healthy men (straight or gay) want both a fantasy life, including regular masturbation - and sex with a partner!. Some lie about the desire for both -- but it is present in every male I've ever known, and I've known a lot of males!.
Kind thoughts,
HermesWww@Answer-Health@Com
Do you watch Sex and the City!?
If so, do you remember when Charlotte's husband had a problem with "Jugs"!. It's a porn mag!. Charlotte cut out pictures of her head from photographs of her and put it over the females faces!. He just liked big boobs!. Maybe your man is this way!. Try talking to him about it!. If he gets magazines try putting your face over them and see if that helps!. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and maybe he'll stop!.
Good luck!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
If so, do you remember when Charlotte's husband had a problem with "Jugs"!. It's a porn mag!. Charlotte cut out pictures of her head from photographs of her and put it over the females faces!. He just liked big boobs!. Maybe your man is this way!. Try talking to him about it!. If he gets magazines try putting your face over them and see if that helps!. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and maybe he'll stop!.
Good luck!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
it seems to me like he has watched porn and masturbated to it for so long, that he is only turned on by porn instead of you!. because he is so used to it!. maybe you should dress up really sexually and nice one day and just surprise him!. start touching him and get him in the mood!.
hope this helpsWww@Answer-Health@Com
hope this helpsWww@Answer-Health@Com
I think a guy would have to be addicted if he would rather look at porn and masturbate than have sex with a real woman!. If it's causing your sex life to taper off, then it's obviously a problem!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
drop your panies your bra everything look as sexy as possible and have lots of sex!. Butt sex and some oral should do the trick!. Or just simply ban the websites or crush the computerWww@Answer-Health@Com
he is crazy!.!.!.try asking him what are his !.!.!.!.sense of sex or say his fantasy and catch that fantasy and fulfill it !.!.
ask him openly!.!.and dont feel bad if he sees porno!.!. u both can see together and share your dreammy fantasy and all!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
ask him openly!.!.and dont feel bad if he sees porno!.!. u both can see together and share your dreammy fantasy and all!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
You could always try watching it with him!. It might turn him on and rejuvinate your sex life!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
uh!.!.!. pornography is wrong!.!.!. and um!.!.!. sex before marriage is wrong!.!.!. um!.!.!. u guys are wrong!.!.!.!. um!.!. that relationship ain't gonna last another year or two!.!.!. uhm!.!. yeah!.!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
just break up with him and get a new b/fWww@Answer-Health@Com