How so I tell him I have herpes?!
Question: I met this guy online a couple of months ago and since then we have become very close infact he is talking about moving were I am and marriage has even come aboutin conversation. I really love him and care about him as he does me, its like we were so meant to be. But I have been struggling with tellin him that I have herpes , At first I was waiting to see if this could actually be possibe that the feeling he has for me are sincere and I know now that they are , this relationship has advanced alot quicker than I expected it to. being that we only have conversation since we are in diff states , I want to tell him b4 he comes to see me. But I don't know how I mean i can just say it but he had already made some comments jokingly regarding herpes so I don't know how he is going to take it , i know they say not to make a big deal about it when u tell someone I just want some advice on the best way to tell someone
Answers: I met this guy online a couple of months ago and since then we have become very close infact he is talking about moving were I am and marriage has even come aboutin conversation. I really love him and care about him as he does me, its like we were so meant to be. But I have been struggling with tellin him that I have herpes , At first I was waiting to see if this could actually be possibe that the feeling he has for me are sincere and I know now that they are , this relationship has advanced alot quicker than I expected it to. being that we only have conversation since we are in diff states , I want to tell him b4 he comes to see me. But I don't know how I mean i can just say it but he had already made some comments jokingly regarding herpes so I don't know how he is going to take it , i know they say not to make a big deal about it when u tell someone I just want some advice on the best way to tell someone
i know that if i had previously had sex with someone before they told me they have herpes our relationship would be over due to the fact that honesty is the most important factor in a relationship.
you should ABSOLUTELY tell him before he makes the trip to see you.......*given the high chance of you two having sex* He may not know much about herpes, but at least if you tell him before he comes to see you he can find out as much information before he gets there and isn't faced with the uncomfortable situation of not knowing and not being able to search for it when he's around you.(he may think it would make you uncomfortable) anyhow...please take all this into consideration.
you should have been up front about that from day one
You should be honest and straightforward. Men appreciate it. Let him know it's something that's very hard for you to express. Good luck.
I don't understand, why don't you treat it. Just treat it before he comes, how did you get it anyway? It is easily treated, if it is only herpes that you have.
Edit: oh really you want from those who have gone through it. Sorry not so many are SICK as you!
Meet him, see if things go in a good direction. And if things get serious, then tell him. If things don't work out, then you don't have to worry about some guy knowing your secret.
You just have to be up front and honest. That is the only way to go.
herpes and HPV are both extremely common, you NEED to tell him before doing anything sexual with him at the very least. There are treatments that can keep you from passing it on, but he needs to be aware to take any precautions he might have to. It's not something you will be able to keep secret for long, so mind as well tell him now before going much further.
be honest if you know whats good for ya
Tell him that you really like him and care for him but before the relationship progresses any further there is something you need to let him know. Dont delay too long, otherwise he may feel decieved when you do eventually tell him.
just tell him not by e-mail but by phone tell him you don't want to lose him but at the same time you will understand if he do leaves you.
I think you should have told him when it was brought up before
and How does that come up to talk about herpes? maybe he to has it?....you need to just tell him before he even comes to see you.
so many people get caught up in internet dating. All it is now is a fantasy. Once you meet and find out that you are just regular people, the fantasy fades. There's something about the thrill of the unknown. He obviously doesn't know some things about you. What do you really know about him? I would say, at least meet the guy first and just get to know him, like where does he work, is he MARRIED? Don't even get into the sex thing yet. If you feel you know him well enough and can TRUST him, then you can tell him and by then you'll know if you're ready to share this kind of info with him. By all means, DO NOT get physical with him till he knows the whole truth, or it will blow up in your face. You also have to be ok with the idea that he may reject you because of what you have, and it's not you or your personality. Good Luck and be careful
It's always better to be honest in any relationship. You need to tell him before he makes the move. But you also need to be ready for his reaction. After you tell him you need to accept his reaction and take a step back and let it sink in. This may take a few days. Lets him choose his path. If he has true love for you then he will work things out. If not then he will move on. True love will always find a way.
JED
first i dont have herpes and haven't been through this but would like to give my advice/opinion (if thats cool w/you)
I think before he starts moving to where you are you need to tell him because he may not be able to deal w/your medical situation; those who are not educated in herpes may be very scared
let him know that you can still have a happy, healthy sexual life but the only difference is that you need to take more precautions (esp during breakout)
but you should go ahead and tell him NOW; let him know that you made some poor choices in your life and you need to let him know this before the relationship go any further
ps: you stay positive and be willing to accept whatever decision he makes
its okay girl just be strong do whatever your heart tells you to do if you and him can get through it that you two will be able to get through anything that comes your way. just think of it that way...
So when were you going to tell me this
I got to go on yahoo answers and find out the girl I like was gonna give me herpes It's over between us lose my email *****
ok well i havent been thru this but i have 2 friends who have herpes and have been thru it. first off have u met him in person yet? if not i think ur best bet would either b to email him or call him and tell him. if u email u can explain and will be able to say everything u feel needs to be said. a phone call its possible u will forget what all u wanted to say or even just not get a chance. no matter how u choose to do it u need to tell him and the sooner the better. just be prepared for rejection. if it is meant to be like u said it is then it will all work out. i give u props for being honest. one of my above mentioned friends sleeps around and doesnt tell the guys she's with that she has it....................now thats messed up. good luck hun and god bless
Don't tell him, he'll figure it out eventually
Oh you have to tell him....
Somehow. OR protection ALL THE TIME, and then break it to him.
Gee, thats quite a pickle.