Terrified of breast cancer, please help me (women only)?!
Question: Okay. I think I may have breast cancer and I'm scared shitless. I have to go see the doctor for an exam but I've dreaded this all my life. I am so modest I can't even have people bump up against me. The idea of having someone see my breasts and...touch them (noone has seen them since I was a YOUNG child) freaks me out, maybe worse than death. I am DISGUSTING! As if physical deformities weren't enough, I just don't know if I'll be able to do this. Really. Anyone would be freaked out by my body, even a doctor. The appointment is not being forced upon me, it's my idea. Are there any reassuring things you can tell me? Any stories of having this done? Or any pointers on how to not wimp out...again.
This is a huge deal which has been bothering me for a while, and I just have to get it dealt with.
Answers: Okay. I think I may have breast cancer and I'm scared shitless. I have to go see the doctor for an exam but I've dreaded this all my life. I am so modest I can't even have people bump up against me. The idea of having someone see my breasts and...touch them (noone has seen them since I was a YOUNG child) freaks me out, maybe worse than death. I am DISGUSTING! As if physical deformities weren't enough, I just don't know if I'll be able to do this. Really. Anyone would be freaked out by my body, even a doctor. The appointment is not being forced upon me, it's my idea. Are there any reassuring things you can tell me? Any stories of having this done? Or any pointers on how to not wimp out...again.
This is a huge deal which has been bothering me for a while, and I just have to get it dealt with.
First thing to do is calm down. You should be congratulated for having enough for sight, to know you should see a doctor about this.
One thing you can do, if you have a male doctor, request a female doctor. Many, many women feel more comfortable with a female doctor. There's nothing wrong with switching doctors. It's done all the time.
You can "take it to the bank" that doctors have seen it all. If you feel that bad about your body, then take a minute and explain to the doctor of any deformities you might have. Be up front with the doctor. Then there will be no surprises from either one of you. Just say, doctor, give me a minute to explain something to you and then say what you want to say before the exam begins. You can also tell the doctor that you're scared shittiest about this whole thing. I'M SERIOUS, use the same word you used here to describe your fears. Can tell you one thing .... I wouldn't hesitate to tell it like it is. I can get just as scared about things as you.
Don't care how you feel about your own body, YOU ARE NOT
DISGUSTING AT ALL, so throw that right out of your head now. Took me awhile to finally come to the conclusion that I had to except my self for who I am. Body and all.
You assume anyone would be freaked out about your body including the doctor. Never assume anything, because the chances are you're going to be wrong.
I'm always nervous about have my yearly physical and I've seeing the same female doctor for years. Don't tell anyone, but there have been many times when I've gone to see my doctor with an attitude I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I'm not saying that, just to make you feel better. My doctor can atest to that.
I know I have to deal with my attitude, you have to deal with not wimping out and do the right thing for yourself. Always remember, you're number one, no matter what the circomstanes are. I also have to deal with my spelling.
If we can't laugh about ourselves, then what's to laugh about.
Bring up that courage from the tips of your toes, because that's when you'll start feeling better about yourself instead of hiding.
You have all my support and I'll be thinking about you. You can take that to the bank too.
First of all- GO TO THE DOCTOR!!! Do NOT wimp out. I have a few things that hopefully will encourage you.
#1- You may be worrying over nothing.
#2- In the event that it IS something to worry about, you need to get treatment ASAP. My grandmother had breast cancer and kept putting off going to the doctor. By the time she finally decided to go, the breast cancer was so bad that her breast had shriveled up and became like a hard rock.
I know it's hard going to the doctor, especially about something you're freaking out about, but you need to take advantage of all the advancements that have been made in the health field.
I'm not a woman, but grew up with freind whose mother had non-malignant cysts removed from time to time. My friend became so concerned by the time she was 20, she was trying to get doctors to give her a radical double mastectomy just so she wouldnt have to deal with all that herself.
She was normal otherwise, and a strong woman.
It took lots of therapy, but eventually she got to the point that she was OK with her breasts, still has them, and mother and daughter (mid 40's) have still not been diagnosed with any cancer.
Get help.
You are right to go to your doctor, so nothing else matters as much as you making this absolutely correct decision.
While it's understandable that this experience may have you worried about modesty, the physicians and technicians just think of it as a body part like any other body part. Being a shy person myself, I found everyone to be very professional. The doctor had me wear the gown with the back in front, and did the exam with the gown closed and hands underneath, only briefly looking for any visual signs. (And trust me it's not a turn on!)
There is a good website that explains this information without showing any graphic images of breasts. I highly recommend you have a look. I've included some links below.
You are great to do something that makes you nervous but gives you a result that you need, way to go girl!
My mom passed away from colo-rectal cancer last year. It had spread to her lymphatic system, her intestines, lungs, and kidneys. I have never had to experience anything so horrific as the long struggle, the suffering and indignities, and being unable to say a few last words to my mother before she passed because she was so heavily sedated in ICU.
This is not a disease that you want to bury your head in the sand about because of modesty. Doctors don't go into practice because they expect everyone they see naked to be fabulous.
GO! Cancer is an agonizing way to die, both for you and your loved ones who have to watch you suffer. I am trying to be harsh so that you will realize the seriousness of getting in to prevent this from happening to you! Prevention is the key!!!!
I hope you are okay. I have heard that when you do a self-exam you should expect the lump to feel like a rock in a bowl of oatmeal because of the natural bumps of the mammory glands inside your breasts. Best of luck to you and God Bless.
I doubt if you are as disgusting as you think. And doctors have seen it all. Most doctors are well aware that some patients are modest and take that into consideration. If you have a good doctor they will sit and discuss why you are there before doing any physical exam and you can explain your concerns about your body then.
I hope this helps and good luck. And remember that you are doing the right thing in getting checked.