What must i do , please tell me?!
Question: Two weeks ago we my husband and i went to visit my Brother-in-law at home. He was finally allowed to go home. I have mentioned before that he was in hospital for 9 months. Anyway , the day after we left [ we live in Crawley and they live in Exeter] he could not move at all, he was not even aware that he had pooed in the bed, so back to hospital he went. My sister was told he had a stroke but today they did a test on him and found that he has got Cancer on the brain. My sister has just phoned me , crying so hard and telling me that he is busy dying and she was going to sit by him. My heart is broken, she is heartbroken and i live so far from her. How can i support her properly , she is going to need someone there to care for her. Ohhhh i am so worried. Is there anyone here that lives in Exeter that can help us. Preferably someone who has gone through it all and knows what it is all about. Please help.:(
Answers: Two weeks ago we my husband and i went to visit my Brother-in-law at home. He was finally allowed to go home. I have mentioned before that he was in hospital for 9 months. Anyway , the day after we left [ we live in Crawley and they live in Exeter] he could not move at all, he was not even aware that he had pooed in the bed, so back to hospital he went. My sister was told he had a stroke but today they did a test on him and found that he has got Cancer on the brain. My sister has just phoned me , crying so hard and telling me that he is busy dying and she was going to sit by him. My heart is broken, she is heartbroken and i live so far from her. How can i support her properly , she is going to need someone there to care for her. Ohhhh i am so worried. Is there anyone here that lives in Exeter that can help us. Preferably someone who has gone through it all and knows what it is all about. Please help.:(
My dear friend it must be hard for you at present, is there no chance of you going to be with her? Because at the moment she is busy keeping herself together for her husband when he goes she will need someone because for so long this has been her life that now it is all changing and he won`t be there it will be hard for her. As previously said the McMillan nurses do a wonderful job of supporting the family as well as the patient. I wish I lived near by because I would be there, but sadly I am further away than you.
My heart goes out to you all I have been at this crossroad a lot of times now and it doesn`t get easier, I hope he does not suffer for too long.
Take care and let your sister know that you are there even if not in the flesh, I am afraid that is all you can do. x
Have they given her any indication how long they are looking at before he dies?
You should contact the Macmillan Nurses, they are ANGELS, they can help your sister emotionally and physically with anything she needs.
All you can do is be there for her over the phone and visit as much as you can. My heart goes out to you, I lost my Dad to cancer 7 months ago.
You definetly need help with this. The doctors should put you in touch with the Macmillan Nurses.
My mum died with brain cancer 12 months ago. There are two types of brain cancer.
Go to this site for more info:-
www.oncologychannel.com/braincancer//i...
I hope this helps and that you find strength to cope with this situation.
I am so very sorry.. As said, contact MacMillan.
And just be there for her. She knows you care, but will have to deal with this in her own way. Wishing you and her and him comfort and strength. x
I am so sorry. This is awful and shocking news for you all.
Is there any way you could go and stay with her for a week or two? If not then all you can do is be at the end of the phone.
I hope she is getting support from the hospital and maybe some counselling could be needed? (for you both?)
A brain cancer can sometimes be difficult to diagnose until they actually see it on the scan. So am sure that is why they first thought it was a stroke as he showed all symptoms of one.
Contact caner research UK as I am sure they could put her in touch with local support groups in her area.
I am a nurse and I have treated many cases of various types of cancer and I really do empathise with you xx
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at: http://whale.to/a/cancer_c.html
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Hello, These situations ar often very difficult for someone to offer advice on the web, however as many other people have suggested ask your sister to contact your Brother in law's GP He/ she will get Macmillan Nurses to see him and offer comfort, reassurance and pain, symptom management, they can also offer a sitting servicewhich allows your sister to have a time out allowing her to recharge in the knowledge that your brother in law is being cared for in a dignified and compassionate manner, The services are there they can be implemented the same day, so just ask.