My dad is trying to kill himself?!
Question: my dad is trying to kill himself and that is putting a great strain on the family, esspecially my mother.
he is drinking himself into comas and passing out, falling down, soiling himself. lately his motor skills are leaving him, he is losing control of his mind a bit and does not know where he is, can't walk straight even when sober, he is a diabetic and alcoholic, 55 years old and says all he has left is his drinking. that is what makes him happy.
i tried doing things, going on roadtrips but he refuses to leave the house. when he is off, he drinks and watchers soccer thats it. if we tell him not to drink, he hides it. he totalled the car last year, fell and busted his forehead at the airport showing up too drunk to be allowed to fly, got out of bed to go pee and fell down. his heart-beats have been very fast.
years ago he was abusive and very aggressive denying he has a problem. now he just sits there quietly drinking and we're worried about his next incident. any advice?
Answers: my dad is trying to kill himself and that is putting a great strain on the family, esspecially my mother.
he is drinking himself into comas and passing out, falling down, soiling himself. lately his motor skills are leaving him, he is losing control of his mind a bit and does not know where he is, can't walk straight even when sober, he is a diabetic and alcoholic, 55 years old and says all he has left is his drinking. that is what makes him happy.
i tried doing things, going on roadtrips but he refuses to leave the house. when he is off, he drinks and watchers soccer thats it. if we tell him not to drink, he hides it. he totalled the car last year, fell and busted his forehead at the airport showing up too drunk to be allowed to fly, got out of bed to go pee and fell down. his heart-beats have been very fast.
years ago he was abusive and very aggressive denying he has a problem. now he just sits there quietly drinking and we're worried about his next incident. any advice?
In Florida there is something called the" Baker Act". Here is a link of its overview. Its pretty interesting, you might check your local area and see if there is anything like this offered. http://www.dcf.state.fl.us/mentalhealth/...
Alcoholism is a disease and it stems in the mind as well. A mental health rehabilitation center will focus on the underlying mental cause to lead to the addiction. Good luck to you and your family.
yell at him! Be like, "hey! stop that!"
put him in a mental hospital where he cant hurt himself.
It's a difficult disease. It's as if the brain of an alcoholic has totally changed and they can't live without the drug. I will pray for your family.
goodluck!
Well, what made him get started like that? He's a grown man and it will be really hard to "make" him look for help, unlike young people...
You can lead a horse to water but you cant make them drink it. He would be better off in jail because he could'nt drink all the time and they would see he got proper counciling
the most horrible thing about addiction is we can't help the addict, at this point short of an intervention there is not much that can be done and it doesn't sound lik you guys want to do an intervention, if so get help from a professional-
Addicts don't stop no matter what you say or do until they wan to stop. It truly is the worst part of the disease that they refuse help. However, if the same person had a tumor they would probably go see a doctor, funny how that works. Your dad is indeed killing himself. He will begin to lose his sight and possibly limbs soon, the diabetes and drinking become lethal. If he doesn't stop he will eventuially wind up in a nursing home because you guys can't care for him and he'll have to stop
the only thing you can do at this point is see a therapist that can help you and your mom manage
I've been there and I know what you're going thru and it's awful
My father-in-law did the same thing and unfortunately we weren't able to help him before he died. I'm sorry you are going through this. You don't, and your family doesn't deserve this. I personally would try and get your mother out of this situation since she needs something better in her life.
I would sincerely suggest that you go to some Alanon meetings. There will be people there who can support you and possibly help you with options for your Dad. Your Mom would benefit from going too, as would anyone in contact with your father.
There is probably something that caused him to start drinking and there is probably a genetic pre-disposition to it. I don't know how you can stop it other than tying him to a chair and making him sober up. I'm not not suggesting it since that would probably jeopardise his health as well, but not having alcohol in the house would be a start.
He is out of control and needs help, but he can't help himself at this point. Really I would get some ideas from others at Alanon and see what can be done. I hope that your Dad somehow stops drinking and he regains his health.
I hope you are able to get through this yourself. Please take care of yourself and your mother.
You can't stop him, and he won't stop until either he is dead, or decides to beat his addiction.
The first thing you must do is to pretend that he is already dead. I know that sounds harsh, but you will find that doing this solves a lot of daily guilt and worry. Unless he is sober, do not help him in anyway. Alcoholics are really not one bit different than heroin addicts.
Hey buddy, i'm so sorry that your little family has to suffer with the crushing grief and pain that alcoholism brings with it. I myself, conquered a particularly nasty alcohol & antidepressant addiction 6 years ago ........... if it wasn't for the fact that my husband was completely at the end of his tether and gave me the ultimatum "get sober and clean up or i'm leaving with the children" i'm sure i wouldn't have been alive and kicking today ? My husband hit me where it hurt though ~my three beautifull babies ...... As others have already said, he has to want to give up .............. perhaps give some description of an ultimatum?? Just a suggestion, but one that you should ponder as really and truly, you do have to be cruel to be kind in this situation ........... he needs to be saved from himself ?
please take care of you & yours?
CHEERS
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Addiction, is a cover for the real killer. Which is something in his reality, that he can't face, or accept. It's the "problem" that drives him to drink,so he can forget, and ignore the feeling that's eatting him up.Some addicts"Use"2 attain a state,of numbing comfort,that brings them happiness, laughing away while they die. Some "use", to attain, numbness,or they will, kill themselves. B honest with him, and let him know that shits, not acceptable. Would he allow you to be that destructive? You can't cure him, but if he isn't happy when he's drunk, then drinking isn't the cure, and hopes still out there. If you accept his inability to face the problem he's running from, then that will give him no reason to stop hidding from that problem.But ,take it from an addict, when I say he is the only one that can make hisself, accept life and stop running from it.