What is the right thing to do?!
Question: What is the right thing to do!?
Ok if you are going to answer this please read it all first!.
I have recently had a new sex partner, we have been safe every time except once and five days later I notice a little sore on my penis, well I went to the doctor two days later and she told me it could one of three things, herpes, syphilis or nothing!. I took a blood test and got it cultured and she told me that I will know in about 48 hours!. The thing is this, I had given blood several times this year and have been found to be STD free and she has been my only partner since then!. So by process of elimination I got it from her!. If it turns out to be one of the STD's I mentioned above I will tell her right away, but should I tell her before I find out for sure!? Part of me thinks that I should put her on warning and another part of me doesn't want to worry her!. I say this also because if it turns out to be nothing and I've already spoken with her about it, it would be the same of me accusing her of having and STD!. What the hell should I do!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
I have recently had a new sex partner, we have been safe every time except once and five days later I notice a little sore on my penis, well I went to the doctor two days later and she told me it could one of three things, herpes, syphilis or nothing!. I took a blood test and got it cultured and she told me that I will know in about 48 hours!. The thing is this, I had given blood several times this year and have been found to be STD free and she has been my only partner since then!. So by process of elimination I got it from her!. If it turns out to be one of the STD's I mentioned above I will tell her right away, but should I tell her before I find out for sure!? Part of me thinks that I should put her on warning and another part of me doesn't want to worry her!. I say this also because if it turns out to be nothing and I've already spoken with her about it, it would be the same of me accusing her of having and STD!. What the hell should I do!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
1st, realize you have not been "safe!."
Long term monogamy with a partner KNOWN to be "clean" is safe!. nothing else is!. Wrapping your willy "reduces the rate of transmission" but doesn't completely stop anything!. Not a thing!.
Tell her right away!. You might stop it going anywhere else and if it's nothing, NBD!.
I can't figure out what you mean by "accusing her of having an STD!." Both of you live with that risk so where's the accusation!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Long term monogamy with a partner KNOWN to be "clean" is safe!. nothing else is!. Wrapping your willy "reduces the rate of transmission" but doesn't completely stop anything!. Not a thing!.
Tell her right away!. You might stop it going anywhere else and if it's nothing, NBD!.
I can't figure out what you mean by "accusing her of having an STD!." Both of you live with that risk so where's the accusation!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
I would just wait to see if it comes back positive, no need to accuse her of something if you don't even know if it's positive or not!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
I would tell her just so she knows ahead of time!. I mean best case its nothing and u tell her its nothing and both of u are cool!. Worst case its something but at least u told her b/c otherwise she could be like why didnt u tell me when u first saw something!. Since u guys are just sex buddies and there are not relationship ties i would tell her!.!.!.hey there friend i think u gave me an STD b/c i know that u screw other people!. and just a word from the wise make sure u always wrap it up with a sex buddies b/c like u said u are not the only one she is screwing and if she doenst make u wear a condom chances are she doesnt make anyoneWww@Answer-Health@Com
You know her best!. And you know your relationship best!.
Assume for the moment that this had NOTHING to do with accusations or STD!. Would you tell her!? "Hey! Check it out - I must have been masturbating too hard and I got this wierd rhinoceros shaped bruise on my penis!" or "That burrito did some nasty things to my intestines, and now I'm in a world of hurt!."
What do you know about her!? Is she going to worry and lie awake and night, wondering whether or not she's infected, wondering what this means for your relationship, wondering about lies and truth-telling!? Or is she going to say "Oh!. Let me know how it turns out!?"
And why are you telling!? Are you a bit scared, and you need to tell someone so that they can comfort you!? Are you feeling the weight of carrying around this information and need to put the burden on someone else, too - to help you carry it!? Neither of these reasons really have anything to do with her, and can be a bit selfish, honestly!.
By the way, giving blood doesn't test for HPV or herpes or chlamydia, or a whole bunch of other STDs!. So if that had been your test of being STD-free, then you really don't know whether or not you are actually STD free!. You could have had these diseases for years before meeting her without knowing!.
Also, if you get a blood test, and it shows herpes, you still don't know if that particular sore was caused by herpes, or if you have oral or genital herpes without symptoms (like so many many people) and the sore was something else!.
I'm sorry to make this so complicated - but it IS a complicated situation!. You just need to assess what your relationship is with this woman, and why you feel the need to tell, and go from there!.
Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Assume for the moment that this had NOTHING to do with accusations or STD!. Would you tell her!? "Hey! Check it out - I must have been masturbating too hard and I got this wierd rhinoceros shaped bruise on my penis!" or "That burrito did some nasty things to my intestines, and now I'm in a world of hurt!."
What do you know about her!? Is she going to worry and lie awake and night, wondering whether or not she's infected, wondering what this means for your relationship, wondering about lies and truth-telling!? Or is she going to say "Oh!. Let me know how it turns out!?"
And why are you telling!? Are you a bit scared, and you need to tell someone so that they can comfort you!? Are you feeling the weight of carrying around this information and need to put the burden on someone else, too - to help you carry it!? Neither of these reasons really have anything to do with her, and can be a bit selfish, honestly!.
By the way, giving blood doesn't test for HPV or herpes or chlamydia, or a whole bunch of other STDs!. So if that had been your test of being STD-free, then you really don't know whether or not you are actually STD free!. You could have had these diseases for years before meeting her without knowing!.
Also, if you get a blood test, and it shows herpes, you still don't know if that particular sore was caused by herpes, or if you have oral or genital herpes without symptoms (like so many many people) and the sore was something else!.
I'm sorry to make this so complicated - but it IS a complicated situation!. You just need to assess what your relationship is with this woman, and why you feel the need to tell, and go from there!.
Good luck!.Www@Answer-Health@Com