Personal question: How did you react when you found out you had cancer?!


Question: Personal question: How did you react when you found out you had cancer?
1. what was your immediate reaction, at that moment? later that day or night?
2. did you eventually go through the 5 stages of grief? (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance)
3. did you think you were going to die, even if you were told you weren't? if not, did you feel you would rather just die?
4. did you feel distant from your family and friends?
5. if you went through chemotherapy AND lost hair, was the hair loss hard for you to deal with?
6. how often did you usually cry when you were fighting cancer?

i realize that this is an extremely personal question, and i am NOT trying to force anyone to answer. thanks in advance to those of you who answer this honestly.
my father had cancer several years ago and he survived. i just don't want to ask him, because we're still not that close and i don't think he would answer openly.

Answers:

1. Anger and self loathing. Whatever unknown foolish thing I had done to develop cancer was going to deprive my children of their mother.
2. Anger. Bargaining (please just give me two more years so my children are that bit older).
3. I am going to die. That's what incurable cancer means. Average prognosis from dx is 33 months.
4. No although it took me a while to tell people and it's still a closely guarded secret.
5. Not applicable.
6. Twice. Both times after I had made it back to the privacy of my car and was alone. Once when first told of the dx. Another time following painful core biopsies. I'm ok with it now.

It would be easier to deal with if you didn't have children. You don't want to frighten them and just carry on as if everything is ok. Maybe that's why your father hasn't been open with you.



I thought I had a cyst, had imaging done, was expecting results to be available on Tuesday and planned to ring on Monday to make an appointment to get what I expected to be routine results.

I got a call from the surgery on Monday morning, before they officially opened, saying my Dr was not in that day but I another Dr wanted to see me that day and I had a 10am appointment.

With that, I knew the news was bad, so made arrangements for my sister to go with me to the appointment.

1. Scared, but determined to beat it. My sister and I went for coffee and cake and by the end of it I was ready to fight for my life.
2. No, nor did I when either of my parents died I think they are a load of rubbish.
3. No. It wasn't my time.
4. No. I felt overwhelmed by the love and support from everyone.
5. No. I shed a few tears as it fell out in handfuls one evening. Had the rest shaved the next day and then went bald for the next 6 months. I was the local weird bald lady.
6. Surprisingly little. I had a few teary moments, maybe 5 - 6.



1. sad, upset, in pain because I didn't find out till 2 weeks after surgery, when I was getting stitches removed.

2. lol who the hell made up those 5 stages???

3. never and no

4. no

5. lost patches of hair from radiation to brain and I didn't shave rest off...probably should have and no it was just a thang!

6. I cried a lot at first...felt like hell, medicines made me feel like hell, fatigue made me feel like hell, no being able to do the simplest things made me feel like hell, then my old dog died in my arms the day i started my radiation and i really felt like hell and more sad over him than me.

i had brain cancer




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