Why do people think its okay to descriminate against fat people?!

As someone who has struggled for many years to lose weight (or who has lost the same weight over and over again) I can really empathise with you. Not only do people brand you as a lazy overeater, but they can also treat you as if you're stupid too. Furthermore it is a fallacy that overweight people stuff themselves, I often look at the amount people thin as a rake put away and am absolutely gobsmacked, if I ate like that I'd be the size of a hippo.

Losing weight is far more difficult that stopping other addictions such as smoking or drinking because it is the only habit that has to be continued for survival. All the others you stop and thats that. People who are trying to stop smoking, for exambple, dont have to puff away on a certain number of fags every days to survive. The other factor is that regardless of how well you control your eating, you have no direct control over what the scales will say, and if you have put in your very best effort and not lost anything, it is so demoralising.

I know how the weight issue can get to the point where when someone offers some bright advice you just feel like screaming because you are so sick of the subject. And you have not asked for advice. But after many many years struggling with this issue I do seem to have finally cracked it. I know I cant say for sure becasue I have got a lot of weight still to lose, but I have been successfully losing weight since the b eginning of the year and have lost a stone so far. The reason I am so confident this time around is because everything seems so completely different now and not any difficulty at all, I would like if I may so share with you the things that turned me around from dieting misery to dieting success. If you cant bear to read about it please stop reading here but I do hope I might be able to help a fellow sufferer because I know how bad it feels

1. I bought the Paul McKenna book 'I can make you thin' which had a CD with it. Although I got minimum benefit from the book itself, the CD really helps. He talks about how we are all brought up to 'clear our plates', finishing everything on it and this messes up our body's natural 'i'm full' signal. Listening to the CD over several weeks reprogrammed my mind to recognise when I was full ulp and to stop there.

2. Do join Weightwatchers, they have a really easy to follow good system, huge support and back up and loads of internet resources, thousands of recipes, tips for success, they teach you how to eat healthily and what foods will make you feel really full up and satisfied. One of the things I learned from them that a sensible weight loss is between half a pound and 2 pounds a week, any more than that is unhealthy, the diet is unrealistic and unsustainable the weight is likely to go back on again.

3. With all the Weightwatchers resources, I starting teaching myself to cook again from scratch, using low fat recipes. I aim to teach myself 5 new things every week, although those things could be anything from soup to a smoothie or a packed lunch, as well as evening meals. I know you are living at home which makes it more difficult to be in controll but I'm sure your mum would be only too pleased to help support you and back you up and either cook some weightwatchers recipes or buy the ingredients to let you make your own. WIth all these new dishes every day I feel like I'm living in a hotel, there is so much variety and enjoyment, I never get bored and never get tempted to eat the wrong things because I am so happy and satisfied eating the things I do.

4. I've made myself a chart which is set out like a river crossing with stepping stones across the river. the aim is to get from one side of the river (my start weight) to the other side (my goal weight) broken down into l pound per stepping stone. I have some glittery 'footprints' which I stick on each stepping stone as each pound comes down. Ok its a very wide river (probably the amazon or something) but I've broken it down into sections and i just concentrate on one section at a time, never looking at the whole picture because that's too big and overwhelming.

5. The final thing is a bit more deep and it may be that this was something personal to myself, but I'll tell it anyway in case it helps. I finally looked at myself properly for the first time, like I was looking at another person, and I saw this person who wanted so deperately to be slim and attractive and able to wear fashionable clothes etc. I saw that the only person who could be there for her and help her do what she wanted so much ... was me. I'm doing it for her now..... well for myself ... this may not make sense but I think it comes down to loving yourself enough to do it for you.

I hope this is of help or at least of comfort, and take heart you WILL do it one day, if not now, one day the moment will just be right to go for it and succeed.

because its self inflicted and they are stupid for letting themselves get that way and then whinging about being fat

That's really horrible that people treat you like that! And I'm really sorry to hear about your nan (sorry, I have a different dialect, so not exactly sure who that is...grandma?).
I understand the vicious cycle thing- it's tough to break free, especially when people are that close-minded and mean.
I personally don't believe that discrimination against a person or group of people is ever really justifiable. Especially considering that it's next to impossible to know a persons complete history or background, what outside influences could be affecting the way they are (or appear to be) in ways that are out of their control.
As for the losing weight, working out thing, it's tough, but you really just have to try ignoring people for a while and keep the end result in mind. I kind of have the opposite problem as you- I'm trying to gain weight in muscle because I'm way too skinny. At the gym I go to work out, the only other guys are the HUGE muscular people...it makes it really intimidating. But I keep going because I know that it's the only way to achieve my goals.
I've seen people with weight struggles find their ways to success, so I know it's possible. Do not give up, and just keep being who you are- because that will be more important in the long run than what you look like, whether you are a super model or not. When people try to make you think otherwise, just remember that it is for exactly that reason that you are the better person.

I don't know about you but I sometimes get fat and that's by my choice to overeat and then not burn it off.
This is because I am too lazy to burn it off and I do like cooking and eating well and I do drink my wine with it and my job is sitting all day so I get fat easily.

Time passes by and fat piles up over fat and this time I have even become obese (This time I gave up smoking so it's worse) and EVEN dwelled a fair bit further this obese territory before finally deciding that it was time to exeercise, just like I have always dealt with it each time I got fat in my life.

I just get my swimming googles, and head to the swimming pool every day or two and swim my 2 hours a session, this causes me to give up the wine, then I get into it and this causes me to give up carbs and so on and so off until bingo I am not only fat-less but I am VERY fit indeed.

And then I kinda lose interest in the swimming and so within 5 years I am fat again. Sometimes I do go swimming before I get too fat so I am quite ok.

I wrote all this to say that 99% of fat people in the world could and should do exactly what I do.

Can't you swim? learn how to swim! Who cares what they say when they look at your fat body. I don't like my body when I am fat either so I try not to get fat but it happens.

When I am fat I have no problem for anyone to call me fat because I am fat and that's a fact, however it does take me a month to be a better swimmer than 90% of those swimmers in the pool and they might be way thin but I am more powerful!
There was a girl one day, she was huge. But she was a great swimmer.. didn't go to the pool to hang about, slowly but surely she did her 100 or so lenghts.

I have more respect for people like her than for fools that just go to the pool to hang about. They might be thin but they are WEAK.

I get fat and when you see me at first coming to the pool you might look down thinking "yeah right you fat whatever" but after 2 or three hours of me doing lenghts and you having to go home else you drown you WILL rethink what you think of me, or you are a fool, whoever you are.

You can be exactly the same. Ok maybe you aren't a half a bulldozer like I am but I am fairly old. At 18 anyone should quickly become strong. Still fat as it takes quite a bit to get rid of it but you get strong fairly quickly.. one or two months swimming and you'll be strong and full of stamina.

Are you fat? so WHAT. Who cares but do something about it, show the world and yourself that it is a transictional time and not your destiny.

If it is your destiny then it is because you are fat in your mind and we can't be fat there, can we?

In the end, if you are fat it is by your own choice. You have internet, you can read and learn, there's no excuse. You have to earn other people's respect by showing that you respect yourself and your body.
There you are now you know my own way of dealing with my own weight...and you are just like me ... you can choose to hate what I said or you can choose to learn from it.
Up to you and good luck.

I didn't read your whole statement but I got the gist. Do know this, there is someone for everyone and that is all over the world. There are men that ONLY like fat women...BBWS and/or SSBBWs.
I even love those big, big girls. My ONLY regret is they are shortening their lives with so much added weight on their hearts. But then no one will live forever.

Yes, I am a member of www.largefriends.com and those 250 to 375 lbs drive me crazy! All that! I look at them on youtube.com too yes,yes,yes.

well i am gifted with an insanly high metabolic rate, but i usually get it at the other end that im too skinny expecially as im a bloke. Tbh when i see over weight people excersising the first thing that comes into my mind is not to make fun of them but i am pleased they are making an effort. Some people laugh but these people are usually fikle self-rightous and will probably end up working at the local super market for the rest of their lives. Kids are cruel, they will find or make something out of nothing for no other reason than they think tis funny. Seriously i know its hard at the level you are getting it but just ignore them, carry on doing a healthy diet, join the gym. If the the gym is too much go night jogging or early morning even if you can manage it. Ask your mum or dad to come with you aswell, my mum and dad are always going on about how they need to excersise more.
At the end of the day it doesn't matter what other people think as they will only play a small part in your overall life.
Hope this helps anyway =)

it isnt a good thing,but it is good to help encourage them to eat right. and walk or work out.

Try dieting and exercising again. If you fail try again. What's stopping you from starting again tomorrow, or even right now? At the moment you ARE making a choice not to do that.

It doesn't excuse the way people are acting. They don't have the right to act like ***** to you. But you're doing yourself no favours by concentrating on their behaviour rather than yours, which is your main problem.