Anorexia Recovery - Please Help!?!


Question: Anorexia Recovery - Please Help!?
Hi. Urrm, my teenage daughter (who has just turned 13) Has always had a thing about weight. When she was about eleven/twelve, she was bullied at school and called fat, and ever since then she has never really been the same about eating. She thinks I don't know, but I am not that stupid, I see the remains of food in the bin, and the school has called me in a few times about how they are concerned about her eating.
She has OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and one of her main issues is eating in front of people. She eats really slowly and just sort of pushes the food around her plate. She shuts herself in her bedroom for hours on end, and is on her laptop, probably on the internet. She has got restrictions, however, me and my husband do think that she can look at pictures of anorexics, which probably doesn't help her situation.
We have taken her to the doctor a few weeks back, and they said, in front of her, that she was fine, and a healthy weight. But as soon as she left, the doctor told us that she was very concerned and that she was showing the very early symptoms of anorexia.
My daughter has a huge phobia of needles, gore, and anything medical (OCD), and if she sees anything she is physically sick, I know as i have had to pick her up from school numerous times.
If she has got anorexia, then will there be any needles involved in the treatment?
Is there anything we can do to help her?
I would tell you her weight, but she will not let us weigh her, she shuts herself in the bathroom, there are scales there, is this bad?
She is always on wii fit.

Could somebody please tell me the treatment for anorexia, and some of the symptoms please, because i am very concerned about my daughter.
Thank you,
Emzz x

Answers:

First of all i'm really sorry you're going through his, and i can say i understand your daughters situation a lot, it sounds exactly like my own, i got anorexia when i was 12/13.
Let me just tell you, your daughter is suffering, a lot. Anorexia strips you of your happiness, you feel empty, not alive, just existing. She desperately needs help, it took my family too long to realise. Tell her you're concerned, she may react angrily, i did, but at the same time it helped me realise i had a problem and she needs to realise to start getting better. I had OCD as well and it makes you feel helpless, like your mind controls what you do, not you. She probably feels very trapped right now an you need to show her you care for her. If she gets angry don't retaliate because it's not her fault, its an illness.
Tell her you'll wait some time but she needs to get better, explain to her that being thin won't make her happy, anorexia kills if it's not treated and she will eventually have to get better. Explain how the situation is hurting you too.
Treatment for anorexia will not involve needles. But if she refused to eat while in hospital then they sometimes have to resort to tube feeding, but like i said if she co operates (which many anorexics do) this won't be necessary.
I would definitely suggest a recovery clinic if she gets much worse. There's one in most areas but i'm not sure where you live so you'd have to look it up, they treat the illnesses much better then hospitals which most of the time don't have enough time to devote to people with anorexia and OCD and focus more on re-feeding not psychological issues.
I would also suggest a psychiatrist, mine helped me a lot.
Last of all, just be there for her, my anorexia and OCD was the most difficult time of my life, i even considered ending my life. It strips you of your personality and your life and your friends and she needs to know that she's loved.
I wish you all the luck in the future xxx

Personal experiences



As a person who has been in treatment centers for having an eating disorder I can tell you that she is fitting some of the criteria for having an eating disorder. They will have to draw blood for tests to see if her body is malnourished. Even though she has a normal body weight, there is a disorder called EDNOS. This is eating disorder not otherwise specified. I suggest you have her go see a therapist and to take the scale out of the bathroom. If she NEEDS to weigh herself then tell her that u MUST be present and at the most once a week. This is a very hard thing to deal with and some people are very ashamed of it. I don't know if this helps any because everyone reacts different to each approach. Good luck and I wish the best for your daughter and family.

My personal experience



She is most certainly showing signs of anorexia; you need to get her help right away. Trust me, as someone who suffered from this illness for a very long time (16-25, recovered for 3 years) I can tell you that once it becomes serious it is very hard to get out of on your own (I still have some issues with body image and food today). She will likely need to see a counselor and a dietitian. If her weight becomes extremely low, she may need to be hospitalised. The consequences of not getting treatment can be dire (I don't want to frighten you, it's just that it is very serious); not the least of which is death, her fertility could also be permanently damages, her hair can fall out, her heart will be under high stress and an imbalance in her sodium-potasium channels could lead to cardiac arrest, if she has started menstruating, she could develop ammenorhea, which could contribute to developing osteoporosis. At her age is it critical that she get proper nutrition or her physical development could be put in jeopardy.

Good Luck.



As you said, from the behaviours that your daughter is showing it is clear that they are all signs of a developing eating disorder. She may be in complete denial about it - as is pretty normal in the beginning stages. I personally never in a million years imagined I would get anorexia, but I fell in to its trap without even realising. I was always "picky" about what I ate, placed an emphasis on what I was doing was "healthy eating" and slowly it turned into restriction and cutting out certain food groups, which all just spiralled out of control. I am now in the recovery phase and would wish with all my heart for parents to step in and try and help their children get help during the early stages before it completely invades the mind. It leaves you powerless over it and the fight against it is life consuming.

As your daughter is afraid of needles, please talk to her GP and find the best way to get her seen for anorexia as fast as possible. Her weight may be normal so if this prevents her from being seen by the NHS then turn to private help. Any help is better than none. In addition, a healthy weight does not mean a healthy mind, and it's best to step in now before that healthy weight turns unhealthy.

Hope this helps, my thoughts and prayers are with you.




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