Do I brush my teeth to much?!

Yes!
2-3 times daily will do - morning, noon, & the most important is before sleep at night to prevent tooth decay & bacteria growth.

Brushing too much will wear your teeth & gums thin.
If you want to prevent mouth odor & for hygienic purposes, you can use mouth wash like Listerine or gargle with plain water. Chewing gums helps too.

YES.
In order to prevent gum & dental problems, you only need to brush twice a day for 2 minutes. Brushing well, but not too hard. It may be worth if you dont have one already, getting an electric brush as some ppl find they find the 'clean' feeling after brushing is better. ALSO - it is important to brush immediately after eating/drinking acidic food/drink as this can lead to erosion of the teeth when the acid attacks them. This is made worse by the scrubbing of the brush while the acid levels are high. Make sure you have a good, low-sugar diet - that and cleaning twice a day will be a good way of preventing problems

Um yes!
Why would you even do that in the first place?

If you like brushing your teeth after every meal, i suggest brush them 3 times a day.
In the morning (after breakfast), after lunch, and after dinner (before you go to bed).

But 5-8? Mate, that's crazy.

Yes
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive%E…

8 is excessive. 3-5 would probably be a better number to aim for. I do mine 2-3 and my teeth are healthy.