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Question: my birth mother gave me away at age of 5 years old because her old man would not marry her unless she gave 2 of her kids away of the 6 kids she had. he was not my blood father. he made her keep his kid they had together.
now i am 39 years old. and want to find my birth father. when i finaly called him he denied ever knowing my blood mother. but, she had his nick name sonny smiley from viginia and his hometown name right. he was in theh army and retired and i got to talk to his wife and he denied knowing my blood mother at all but, how could my birth mother no his nick name and were he was from if it is not true? he was in the army in my birth mother town too. so how can he not even take a blood test so i can no my roots? and is there a way i can make him take one? and how can my mother know his back ground so much if the story is made up??
I don't want to let it go because of health reasons and for my childen and there childrens to come. what can i do. should i right him another


Answers: my birth mother gave me away at age of 5 years old because her old man would not marry her unless she gave 2 of her kids away of the 6 kids she had. he was not my blood father. he made her keep his kid they had together.
now i am 39 years old. and want to find my birth father. when i finaly called him he denied ever knowing my blood mother. but, she had his nick name sonny smiley from viginia and his hometown name right. he was in theh army and retired and i got to talk to his wife and he denied knowing my blood mother at all but, how could my birth mother no his nick name and were he was from if it is not true? he was in the army in my birth mother town too. so how can he not even take a blood test so i can no my roots? and is there a way i can make him take one? and how can my mother know his back ground so much if the story is made up??
I don't want to let it go because of health reasons and for my childen and there childrens to come. what can i do. should i right him another

I am not sure what to think of your "Birth-Mother", But that's not important. What is though is if this man is your "Biological-Father". There is a way to get his D.N.A., But it could cost you a bit. as far as the courts go, you cannot make him do anything, regardless of your Mom's story. It's "Hearsay", and that's just not enough. What you can do is get this guy's D.N.A. through his "Trash". It's not "Stealing" once it has left that curb. Or follow him and wait for him to discard a can, or cigarette, or cup. In the trash, look for things like "Razors, smoke butts, anything a "man" may have used. Now days, with the advancements they have made testing D.N.A., just "Trace-Amounts" are needed. If he smoked a cigarette, drank from a can, where-ever his lips have touched, they can extract the stuff. But, you would have to get it, or have a private-investigator do it for you. It would be cheaper if you did it yourself, But the testing part will probably be costly. Thats the only part that is really bad. Most people cant afford it from what I hear, But then again, I have never done this so I do not know personaly. I do know it can be done, you can find out, if you can afford it. Thats about all I can tell you that may help you hun. I will say a prayer for you, and hope for the best. Remember, whatever happens is what was supposed to happen, So if this guy is "Never" a part of you and the kids life, Well, His-Loss then right! Thats the way you should see it also.Good-Luck to you, And stay-strong. Take care, and God-Bless to You and Yours. 1st Sgt., 7th Special Forces, (Ret.) Vietnam 67-70

to be quite honest, i wouldnt trust your mother completely in any case. she gave you away so her "old man" would marry her?

She may have known him well and been more interested in him then he was in her. She may have just been a girl at another port, or he does not wish to turn back the clock. You can not force him to do a DNA test. There would have to be a really good health reason and the courts would have to get involved. Sometimes the best family is the family we create our selves - this is something I have had to accept over the years. Blood does not always make for the perfect family. You should let it go. He now knows of your existence and if he wants to pursue it he will. Make the best of your existing family - live for them like others did not for you.

First give him alittle time to digest the idea of you. After all, to have a child you may have, or may never have known contact you after 39 years is quite a thing. Give it a week and contact him again, but this time with your agenda of health background for your kids. Maybe he will feel more obligated to let you know. Even just for conscious sake.

yep





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