Need help with "drug problem" please answer?!
Question: Need help with "drug problem" please answer!?
I neep help, please don't judge me- drug related!?
I am so angry at myself!. I guess I have fallen off the bandwagon!.!.!.!.I have been clean for 8 years!. Tonight I went into a known drug neighborhood looking for either heroin or roxys!. I picked up this guy who told me he was gonna take me to his friend who would have some roxys and we were basically gonna swap pills!. Apparently, I have been out of the scene a while and I let him get out of the car with my pills!. We were in back of an apartment building and I wasn't paying attention!. After a few minutes I realized he wasn't coming back!. So I looked for him a bit and then went home!. The fuc*ed up part is that I was more upset about not getting the drugs I wanted or at least getting my pills back then I was about what I could have done to my family, that I could have been arrested, possibly been raped or murdered by this guy, or die from an OD!. I deserve to feel bad I know!. I don't know what to do now!. I told my husband!. I called a help-line!. I'm really afraid I'm going to go back to drugs now!. I know I will lose everything that I have if I do!. I am bipolar type 1 (the worse type) and I know this was an impulsive act brought on by it!. It's not an excuse but my medication is not helping!. I almost feel like I need to be in the psych ward!. Please don't judge me, because you're only going to make me feel worse and it's like telling an overweight person they are fat!. I'm just gonna get more depressed and more likely to do it again!.
32 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer!.
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11 minutes ago
I'm actually physically sick to my stomach!. This guy asked me to perform a sexual act in exchange for the pills and I said "absolutely not!"!. I never did that but just the thought that I could be that bad makes me sick!.
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You know what!.!.!. You are a strong woman, and the fact that you resisted the request to perform a sexual act on him just proves that!. You know whats important in life, and I can tell that!. Im proud of you, and its understandable to feel guilty!. Just remember that its going to hurt the people around you, and you were lucky that he ran off with the pills!.!.!. Otherwise its likely you would be out again lookin for some!. Are you happier where you are now, or where you were 8 years ago!? You became clean for a reason!.!.!. I imagine back then when you were at your worst you wished like hell you had never started!.!.!. If you start again, in 3 weeks you will feel the same way!. You have given yourself a fresh start!. Make the most of it!. Make sure you have a huge support network, and book in to see a professional!. I am bipolar as well, and I am scared of doing stuff through impulse (even killing somebody)!. I feel like the only way I can be safe from myself is to be lockd up sometimes!. Its important to make sure you talk to people about your problems!. Your hubby seems supportive, and just make sure you share your feelings with him!. Good luck, and feel free to message me if you want to chat!. Oh!.!.!.and are you on meds for your bipolar!?!?x
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talk to somebody you trust, then a professional figure to get help!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
talk to somebody you trust, then a professional figure to get help!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Dont be mad at yourself!.!.!.its so great you've been clean for eight years, just look at how much you have accomplished already! Relapses happen and you did the right thing by telling your husband and calling the help line!. You will always be an addict but a recovering addict!.!.!.going through treatment would be good but I know it can be expensive!.!.!.several churches (where I live anyways) hold meetings for alcohol and drug abusers!. I know you've done good so far but you may be reaching a wall in your recovery process, try to find a support group and remember how much you have to stay clean for!. Talk to your doctor if you feel your medication is no longer doing you any good, they may need to change things around to help more!. Good luck and remember that you are not a failure, these things are expected and with a good support system you will overcome it!Www@Answer-Health@Com
It kind of sounds like you answered your own question!. Obviously you know whats at stake, and only you know how bad off you are feeling!. If you really think you can't control yourself then do check yourself into some sort of facility that helps with this type of situation!. If you think you can spare time instead, make an appointment with someone who can help, a councelor, psychologist, psychatrist, you know the drill!. Also, you should obviously be seeking out another medication if yours is not helping you!.
Not to mention, you got lucky!. Nothing did happen to you and you didnt actually end up doing the pills, so you are still clean!. take what happened as a sign, whether you are religious or not!. And how can you be that bad if you said absolutely not to him!? Don't worry about what could have happened, just try your hardest not to keep yourself away from those situations!.
Freaking out about it doesn't do anything but make you want the drugs more, so try to relax!. You are the only one that can truly determine whether or not you are going back, and you got off them once and stayed for 8 years so why wouldnt you be able to do it again!?Www@Answer-Health@Com
Not to mention, you got lucky!. Nothing did happen to you and you didnt actually end up doing the pills, so you are still clean!. take what happened as a sign, whether you are religious or not!. And how can you be that bad if you said absolutely not to him!? Don't worry about what could have happened, just try your hardest not to keep yourself away from those situations!.
Freaking out about it doesn't do anything but make you want the drugs more, so try to relax!. You are the only one that can truly determine whether or not you are going back, and you got off them once and stayed for 8 years so why wouldnt you be able to do it again!?Www@Answer-Health@Com