HELP with my grandmother!?!
Question: HELP with my grandmother!!?
my grandmother is of the age of 95!. she is in a electric wheel chair and a respiration/vocalization machine!.My sister and I have been taking care of her since she was 85, When my mother passed away, and recently she has become worse!. She has become very mean and senile!. Over these past few weeks she has become very violent!. She attempts to kick and hit me and my sister with her cane(why she still carries a cane i don't know)!. She repeatedly sets her voice box to " I HATE YOU" and repeatedly runs into my sister and I's doors when were sleeping constantly waking us up!. We lock the door now so she can't get out but now whenever my sister or i make food for her she throws it up in the air, plate and all, and says " this is crap"!. we tried to unplug her voice box but you can't do that unless you unplug the respirator which i don't what to do, unless necessary!. She also frequently has panic attacks where she thinks wolverines are attacking her and i can never get her to calm down until she falls asleep !. Can someone please give me some advice or guidelines on how to control her and calm her down during these panic attacks!?
PLEASE!!! I'M LOOSING MY HAIR!!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
PLEASE!!! I'M LOOSING MY HAIR!!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
Answers:
Wow!.!.I feel so bad for you!. I would reccommend telling her about how much you love her and care abou her!. Also tell her that if something ever happened to her, you wouldn't know what to do!. Tell her that she means a lot to you!.
Also, I'd reccommend asking another loved one that you trust for help!. It could even be a friend!. He or she could always be there for you when you need them the most!.
I'll tell you one honest thing, you're VERY strong!. You're mother passed way and now your grandma is like this!. You have a lot of courage and a huge will to live!. Stay like this and things will turn out fine, I promise you!.
And about the panic attacks!. I would make an appointment with a doctor to ask about those!. While she's having them, gently stroke her head and tell her you love her and everything will be okay!. Also give her a warm blanket or something and put it on her to help he be comfortable!.
About the dinner!.!.Ask her what she wants to eat, and for a while, try to cook her what she wants!. If she still dislikes it, tell her you tried your best for her!.
Since your mom passed away, witch is most likely her on daughter, she's probably just going through a rough time!. Give her some time to let it pass and calm down a little!. She won't be as bad when she started to heal inside!.
Just stay strong like you are now, keep her close to you, take care of her as if your life depended on it, and let her know you love and care for her!.
It would be kinda mean, but if you completly don't want to take care of her anymore and want to move on, consider a Seniors Home!. She can make friends and have other people take her of her there!. That might help her emotianly heal!.
I really hoped I helped!. Best of luck to you and your sister!. I'm only 13!. I can't beleive I'm giving this kind of advice XD!
Well, I'll be checking back, and if you have any other questions, just add some additional details and I'll read them and answer them for you!.
(I check often)!.
God Bless!.
XoXoXo!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
Also, I'd reccommend asking another loved one that you trust for help!. It could even be a friend!. He or she could always be there for you when you need them the most!.
I'll tell you one honest thing, you're VERY strong!. You're mother passed way and now your grandma is like this!. You have a lot of courage and a huge will to live!. Stay like this and things will turn out fine, I promise you!.
And about the panic attacks!. I would make an appointment with a doctor to ask about those!. While she's having them, gently stroke her head and tell her you love her and everything will be okay!. Also give her a warm blanket or something and put it on her to help he be comfortable!.
About the dinner!.!.Ask her what she wants to eat, and for a while, try to cook her what she wants!. If she still dislikes it, tell her you tried your best for her!.
Since your mom passed away, witch is most likely her on daughter, she's probably just going through a rough time!. Give her some time to let it pass and calm down a little!. She won't be as bad when she started to heal inside!.
Just stay strong like you are now, keep her close to you, take care of her as if your life depended on it, and let her know you love and care for her!.
It would be kinda mean, but if you completly don't want to take care of her anymore and want to move on, consider a Seniors Home!. She can make friends and have other people take her of her there!. That might help her emotianly heal!.
I really hoped I helped!. Best of luck to you and your sister!. I'm only 13!. I can't beleive I'm giving this kind of advice XD!
Well, I'll be checking back, and if you have any other questions, just add some additional details and I'll read them and answer them for you!.
(I check often)!.
God Bless!.
XoXoXo!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
i'm sorry to say but her condition appears far on, you might want to think about a assisted living centre!. if that is not an option then speak to her doctor about small doses of tranquilizers that my be given when needed to calm her down!. I know you do not wish to place her a state of coma, but she will need meds to control her mood swings/panic attacks!. God Bless you and best wishesWww@Answer-Health@Com
well i would say insence imm not an expert soo i would say tht you should get your sister and grandmother and sit down in the livin room and have talk and i she startes to say crap or mean thing tell her to be qiute i a nice gental manner and tell her tht she is hurtin you and your sisters feelin and if that doesnt work tell her that uyou will have to put her in a care home if this type of behavior does not stop !.!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think you should see a doctor; they have medications for this!. It could also be time to put her in an assisted care center, and let some professionals handle it!. A lot of people feel guilty for doing that, but really sometimes it's just out of your hands!. But absolutely talk to a doctor!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
i just wanted to start by saying its very good of both u and ur sister to have taken on the responsibility of your grandma!. i think you should take her to a home/hospital now especially if she is becoming violent!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
Call her Dr!. and tell him what is going on!.She probably has gotten to the point of dementia where medications are required!.Your only other option is to put her in a nursing home where people who deal with this all the time can care for her!.Good luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com
Oh my god, what a horrible burden to place on you and your sister! Seriously, look for an assisted living place or a nursing home!. It may sound harmless, but it seems like one of the only sensible choices here!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Consult a social worker!. There are public services available which should be of help to you, and the social workers are the experts!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
I think that maybe you should take her to a doctor and try to figure out what is wrong!. I am so very sorry for you and your grandmother!. Good Luck!Www@Answer-Health@Com
alright man im just 16 but i think you should consider counseling for her or just sit her down and talk to her, contact me if neither works!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
time for her to go to a home for alzheimer's /dimenshia where she can get taken care of 24/7!. Www@Answer-Health@Com
Not trying to be mean, but take her to a home!.!.!.where old people live!. that would drive me nuts too!.
Www@Answer-Health@Com
Www@Answer-Health@Com
how long has it been since she has been to the doctor for a routine check up!? sometimes electrolytes such as sodium and potassium can become unbalanced and cause mood changes!. this can be a serious thing that needs to be corrected asap!. urinary tract infections are also known to cause these kind of behaviors in the elderly!.
she also may be depressed and may need medication to help her with this!. they also make anxiety meds that can be given as needed!.
i would definately take her to the doctor for further eval and go from there!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
she also may be depressed and may need medication to help her with this!. they also make anxiety meds that can be given as needed!.
i would definately take her to the doctor for further eval and go from there!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
Please listen to me!.!.!.
My mother died in August last month and she was 82!.!.!.
She was diagnosed by her doctor as having severe dementia which is similar to Alzheimer's!.!.!.
She could not walk and talked so little!.!.!.
She had no teeth to chew food with so we fed her baby food that was already pureed!.!.!.
She had to stay in bed and wear a catheter so she would not pee all over herself and the bed!.!.!.
She wore adult diapers too!.!.!.
We had several nurses come in from the organization called Hospice!.!.!.
They are funded by all kinds of private organizations and do not cost a thing to use their services!.!.!.
If you grandmother is still receiving Social Security which she probably is at her age, she can use the Hospice service at no cost to you!.!.!.
She should also be getting medicine from Medicare or Hospice!.!.!.
If you call the national organization of Hospice, they will come see your grandmother and diagnose her and get her on the right kind of medication to help her!.!.!.
Please do this as soon as possible so your grandmother will not harm herself or you!.!.!.
You should also be saving or planning for her funeral if possible!.!.!.
Someone will need to pay for that when the time comes if there is not already a plan in place!.!.!.
Let me know how it turns out!.!.!.
I am very interested!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
My mother died in August last month and she was 82!.!.!.
She was diagnosed by her doctor as having severe dementia which is similar to Alzheimer's!.!.!.
She could not walk and talked so little!.!.!.
She had no teeth to chew food with so we fed her baby food that was already pureed!.!.!.
She had to stay in bed and wear a catheter so she would not pee all over herself and the bed!.!.!.
She wore adult diapers too!.!.!.
We had several nurses come in from the organization called Hospice!.!.!.
They are funded by all kinds of private organizations and do not cost a thing to use their services!.!.!.
If you grandmother is still receiving Social Security which she probably is at her age, she can use the Hospice service at no cost to you!.!.!.
She should also be getting medicine from Medicare or Hospice!.!.!.
If you call the national organization of Hospice, they will come see your grandmother and diagnose her and get her on the right kind of medication to help her!.!.!.
Please do this as soon as possible so your grandmother will not harm herself or you!.!.!.
You should also be saving or planning for her funeral if possible!.!.!.
Someone will need to pay for that when the time comes if there is not already a plan in place!.!.!.
Let me know how it turns out!.!.!.
I am very interested!.!.!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
when people lose their independence as a result of age related illnesses, they tend to take it out on everyone around them!. she may be a little senile too!. the best thing that you and your sister can do is to shower her with kindness!. ask her what she would like to eat!. talk to her about what her life was like when she was growing up!. if she feels that you all are interested in her she may start to come around!. talk to her dr!. he may be able to prescribe something to help her calm down!. check to see if she has any friends that are still living that she can reconnect with!. people love to revisit their past!.Www@Answer-Health@Com
First of all!.!.I commend you for taking this responsibilty!.I took care of my Grandpa for the last 7 years of his life and it can be heart renching!.He was 92 when he passed!.
She is scared!.Plain and simple!. And she's lashing out, when she's lucid, because she's afraid!. Imagine losing hours or days at a time because your old and your mind is failing you!.
Be understanding and as patient as you can!. its HARD!. I know!.
Thank you for being one of the few that TAKE CARE OF THEIR OWN!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
She is scared!.Plain and simple!. And she's lashing out, when she's lucid, because she's afraid!. Imagine losing hours or days at a time because your old and your mind is failing you!.
Be understanding and as patient as you can!. its HARD!. I know!.
Thank you for being one of the few that TAKE CARE OF THEIR OWN!!Www@Answer-Health@Com
There is a definite need for assessment of your grandmothers' condition!. She appears to have worsened with the advancement of dementia over the period of 10 years that you and your sister have been caring for her!.
I want you to know that there is nothing unusual about your grandmother's behaviour!. It is not uncommon for elderly people to behave like this with family members and then when outsiders come along they change their behaviour to a very civilized manner!. There is a belief that they have a right to discipline you a children even though you are far from being so and that you have a responsibility to look after you in their old age!. This leads to aggression, bullying and violence!. This is often denied when they are approached about it later!.
This was the case with my mother who would be 91 years if alive today and although she didn't have bad dementia had aggression problems also!. I looked after her until last year and have some idea of what you are experiencing!. However, I didn't have her in a wheel chair!.
I tend to agree with those who say that she should be taking some form of medication for her condition!. However, if she does not accept that there is anything wrong with her she may not accept the medication from you!. it may be necessary in this case for you to place her in care!.
I think that it would be a good idea if you could place her temporarily in care!. This is called respite in Australia!. It is recommended that carers place their elderly loved ones in care for two or three weeks and go away for a holiday just to maintain their sanity as this type of behaviour drives people crazy!. This would also give you and your sister time to decide what you wanted to do long-term without your grandmother being around to pressure you!.
Also it does the elderly or disabled person good to have other company!. They avoid having you constantly in their company and they usually won't dare pull the type of stunts on carers that they pull on family!.
Get medical help from a doctor - her GP or another family doctor!. Then if their is a community aged care assessor get them to assess her!. She is a nursing home level of care!. They may suggest that your grandmother goes straight into a nursing home as she is too great a social and medical burden on you and your sister!. One the other hand you may be able to access state or federal assistance for aged care - again I don't know what
I want you to know that there is nothing unusual about your grandmother's behaviour!. It is not uncommon for elderly people to behave like this with family members and then when outsiders come along they change their behaviour to a very civilized manner!. There is a belief that they have a right to discipline you a children even though you are far from being so and that you have a responsibility to look after you in their old age!. This leads to aggression, bullying and violence!. This is often denied when they are approached about it later!.
This was the case with my mother who would be 91 years if alive today and although she didn't have bad dementia had aggression problems also!. I looked after her until last year and have some idea of what you are experiencing!. However, I didn't have her in a wheel chair!.
I tend to agree with those who say that she should be taking some form of medication for her condition!. However, if she does not accept that there is anything wrong with her she may not accept the medication from you!. it may be necessary in this case for you to place her in care!.
I think that it would be a good idea if you could place her temporarily in care!. This is called respite in Australia!. It is recommended that carers place their elderly loved ones in care for two or three weeks and go away for a holiday just to maintain their sanity as this type of behaviour drives people crazy!. This would also give you and your sister time to decide what you wanted to do long-term without your grandmother being around to pressure you!.
Also it does the elderly or disabled person good to have other company!. They avoid having you constantly in their company and they usually won't dare pull the type of stunts on carers that they pull on family!.
Get medical help from a doctor - her GP or another family doctor!. Then if their is a community aged care assessor get them to assess her!. She is a nursing home level of care!. They may suggest that your grandmother goes straight into a nursing home as she is too great a social and medical burden on you and your sister!. One the other hand you may be able to access state or federal assistance for aged care - again I don't know what
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