I think my boyfriend has anorexia, HELP!?!


Question: I think my boyfriend has anorexia, HELP!?
Okay so we're 18 and my boyfriend is one of those really stubborn people, like once he decides on doing something, he's gonna do it and never listen to anyone else. And recently a lot's been happening, like he moved out from his abusive parents and lives by himself now and he's switching his style to like "emo." He's 6'3" and used to weigh 190 pounds like he's muscular but he got obsessed with his appearance and kept saying he's ugly and he wants to be skinny instead of built and wants to loose weight ASAP. And for the last past week ALL he eats is an apple in the day, a few grapes in the afternoon when his stomach rumbles, and an orange at night. That's it, and he doesn't like cheat or anything, that's literally all he eats. And he's lost 13 pounds in 7 days and now weighs 177 and wants to keep going until he's at 135-145. But he looks really really unhealthy, like the other day I thought he was wearing eyeliner cause his eyes were so dark but that's just how they are now. And sometimes he says everything looks blurry and has trouble breathing and it looks like he's gonna faint any second and he never has any energy and he throws up sometimes too even though he never ate. I'm really worried and I tried to make him eat something but he refuses and said he's not gonna stop until he's at least 145 and tells me to mind my own business:(. I don't know what to do, how do I get him to be healthy again?

Thanks!

Answers:

Your boyfriend needs help. His iron level is probably low which is why he has dark circles around his eyes. 13 lbs. in 7 days is unhealthy. If he continues this he will faint at some point because he is not taking in enough calories for his body to run efficiently. When he faints call an ambulance and tell the doctors what he is doing. Unfortunately when someone has true anorexia nervosa there is nothing you can do to make them see the foolishness of what they are doing to themselves. This is a mental health issue and he needs help soon. The reason I mentioned calling an ambulance when he faints is because he will not be able to push you away then. I would tell him until his energy level is up he cannot drive a car. He could easily pass out behind the wheel and hurt himself or someone else. Something has triggered this in him and the sooner he sees a mental health professional the better. Ask him to at least go see his doctor to make sure everything is okay. Don't mention the weight loss when you ask him that. Just tell him it will make you feel better if he does. Tell the doctor what is going on, when your boyfriend isn't around, and he will get him the help he needs.

Nurse for 30 years.



In my opinion, get him to the hospital as soon as possible or he will collapse sooner or later. You can save him from getting any worse :) just stay positive I wish you the best!



That definitely fits the criteria for an eating disorder.
He needs help and support but he also needs to know that you still love him and accept him no matter what.

What ever you do DON'T pressure him to eat. You can tell him you're worried and want him to be healthy. You can ask that he please eat something and ask that he please get help but don't bully him into eating, don't tell him you will leave him, stop loving him etc because this will only make it worse.

I think you should try to talk to him about what is going on and see if he even understand that this is a problem. If he does you might be able to get him some help but if he doesn't think he has a problem he will likely resist any help you offer him.

I would recomend you go to either or both of the "confession" sites just to help you understand a bitwhat is going on in his head: edconfessions.tumblr.com confessionsabouteatingdisorders.tumblr.c…

Interesting rant-like article on why not to be anorexic http://sans-gras.xanga.com/578731787/so-you-want-to-be-anorexic/

This site is fairly useful and I'm sure you can find others if you google it http://www.something-fishy.org/

Skinny boy by Gary Grahl is about a boy's struggle with the eating disorder

I have struggled with Anorexia for years




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