Am I destined to stay this weight or did my bad year cause it?!


Question: Am I destined to stay this weight or did my bad year cause it?
I am currently at my heaviest weight, 142. I have never been this heavy , unless I was pregnant. After my second child I got stuck at a weight of 135, which for me at 5'2" felt too fat to me. Little did I know 142 was around the corner.My weight seems to get STUCK at a certain point and does not want to budge but a few lbs. Im scared this is the case now.
I had an usually hard year though. First my husbands emotional abuse got out of control, my friend that I worked for, claims to have fallen in love with me.... so the need to stay loyal to my mean husband, versus letting myself fall into the arms of a man that thinks I make the world go round, was an awful, awful struggle. And during this time, my boys both have language disorders I alone deal with, cause my husband works his but off. I broke my foot and got laid up for 3 weeks, immediately following I got my tubes tied and it went, not so well, recovery took a couple weeks. Shortly after that I got attacked by a dog at my job and my lower leg was badly punctured in many places and I developed a blood clot.. Which laid me up for another 3 weeks. During all this my husband was still a bear.. and it came to a head and I had to threaten to leave. He is now on anxiety meds and life is much smoother, and Im very glad I stuck it out, really even in my darkest moment, I had no real intention on leaving, anyhow
The cake topper came when my dear Pop Pop began threatening suicide. I had long talks with him about what he means to all of us, how much I would rather he let God take him when its time, so on and so forth...alll very horribly upsetting. We did some intervention, but being the stubborn man he is, he killed himself anyhow. We were devastated, still are reeling from that loss, always will I suppose. But during that time, 3 months ago, I ate like a wild woman, i guess Im a stress eater.

So my question is, do you think my weight gain can easily be fought, that it may have been brought on by unusual circumstances, or am I destined to be stuck around this weight?

Answers:

Hi.Well,you have clearly been through a lot,and you seem to have found a way to overcome many of these obstacles.Maybe not all of them,but you've really handled yourself quite well I must say.And,for that? You should give yourself a pat on the shoulders! Not too many people can overcome those obstacles without suffering much worse,especially emotionally.
Your biggest enemy is food! I tend to turn to food as a comfort myself,and have unfortunately gained a few pounds myself over the past 3 and a half months.I'm 5 foot 6 and a half inches,and weigh about 156.I was at a good weight at 138 3 and a half months ago...until my husband also got me very stressed out,and also many other aspects of my life also took over.
So,you need motivation! Your not stuck my dear....not at all! Motivation is the key,and also add some self esteem into the mix,and you got yourself a great combination to win this battle.
You get my point? It really doesn't matter if your a stress eater or not! It basically boils down to motivation and self esteem! The way your home situation and marriage are now going....seems to have balanced out so far.Your husband seems to be working on his own(note the word his own) issues,and your health has improved a great deal,and I'm guessing your children are also doing well also.I'm deeply sorry for the loss of your 'Pop Pops',and I know how much of a loss that is.I lost both my grandparents long ago,and it was tough for me to adjust without them both.They were always so so supportive of me...no matter what stupid decisions I ever made.
But...now things have balanced out,and now is your golden opportunity to take full advantage of this opportunity.You can 'Google' a good daily diet plan,and a daily goal for yourself...I'm not good with offering advice for either right now.But,you can easily 'Google' both and start to slowly built your self esteem,and self confidence again.
I have a good feeling that you will be able to accomplish this,and I only say that because now everything has balanced out in your personal life...at least balanced out well enough.Right?
So,all that being said...try to find the right daily diet,exercise routine,plan and set your goals,but not too high from the beginning.And,keep in mind....this takes time,and you should never expect too much from yourself in the beginning.Start out slow with your diet,exercise routine,and your daily goals,and things will only go up from there.You have always had it in you....but,as with everyone when stress gets in the way...it's much more difficult to take time to even care for yourself.And,that's because we(you) are so involved with everyone elses problems....we(you) tend to forget and neglect our own physical and emotional needs.
Give it a shot....you have everything to gain,and nothing to lose besides the weight....
Wishing you all the very best.Take care.



I'm so so sorry for everything that you have gone through, especially the loss of your Pop Pop. And now is the time to change for the better, and move on. You can and should try to get back to a healthy weight. It will not be that hard at all compared to the emotional distress 3 months ago.
I know you can do it! You're really strong :)
Good luck!




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